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WTF – Bamboo Salt Toothpaste

December 8, 2013


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Whoa! I can’t believe I’ve been here for over 5 years and have just heard about this now! Seriously! You might think “what the hell, Simon? Bro do you even dentalcare?” to which I’d respond “Yes! I take great care of my teeth! I brush and floss twice a day! FLOSS! YES I FLOSS! People say that they floss when they want to lie to their dentist so they don’t get scolded when their gums are all bloody but I actually floss! I just always bought mint toothpaste. I didn’t even look at the other stuff. There was no point in looking at the other stuff.

It’s just like how I shop. When Martina and I go shopping I’ll walk in a store and in 30 seconds I can say “nothing here for me. Let’s GTFO,” and she’ll say “no look at this!” but I’ll already have scanned the store and processed all the incompatibilities. For toothpaste my brain is like “locked on target. All other peripheral data is irrelevant.”

So, you might say, “How, Simon, did you get this toothpaste, then?” and the reason is simply because we were in a bind for toothpaste, so we went to a convenience store, and that was their only option. That is when the mind-trip occurred. We knew we had to do a WTF on it.

I think my reaction to the toothpaste was a bit strong, though. It wasn’t really terrible. Not like Ginseng-Candy terrible (I WON’T apologize for not liking Ginseng Candy!). I think it was like when we first came to Korea, and we tried some stuff that we never tried before, and were grossed out, but then after a while grew to love, like cereal milk. This was the first time in my entire freaking life that I had non-minty toothpaste. You can see how my worldframe got shattered. Yes “worldframe” is a word!

I feel totally shocked about the similar tingly sensation I got from the bamboo toothpaste, though, because I only attributed that tingle to mint. Mint makes your mouth tingly and cool. Nothing else in the world ever can do that. But to think that bamboo salt does the same thing? INCONCEIVABLE! THE MINT IS A LIE! Mint doesn’t tingle. Chemicals in dental care tingle! The mint is just an extra flavour. I feel like I just woke up from the Matrix.

Side note: in case you didn’t see that old video in the corner, you can check it out here in its entirety:

Anyhow, sorry this video came a day late! We’ve got ten days to get ready for going back to Canada for Christmas, and we’re working on the EYKAs and putting up new stuff in our store, and yesterday we were on the set of a music video shooting! Woot! It’s top secret though and we’re not allowed to talk about it at all. BUT IT LOOKED GREAT! Oh man we’re such teases. You should subscribe, if you haven’t already, just in case we upload something pertaining to that video, which I doubt we’ll get permission to do but MAYBE JUST MAYBE…



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