Dance! Whoo-ooo! I wanna dance Dance DANCE Da-ance!

So, I know some of you might be wondering this: if Martina’s so bad at grocery shopping, and constantly getting distracted by other fun and flashy things in the store, why don’t I go with her? My answer: I have a deep hatred of shopping. I hate it. I feel totally fine and great before I walk into a shopping complex, but if I spend ten minutes in there I feel like my soul is whittling away. I don’t know what it is. I worked in a mall for a big part of my teenaged years (Pickering Town Centre represent!), and I think that from the crazy amount of hours I worked there I spent more time in a mall than most people will in their entire lives. I’ve had enough! Now, whenever I go shopping, I know exactly what I’m going for. I walk into a shop and within 20 seconds I know if it has what I need or not. No, I don’t want to hear about your sales. I’m not interested. And when I buy something, no I won’t give you my phone number, email, or postal code. I’ve given you my money. You’ve given me your product. Our relationship is over.

So, if you can’t tell, I have a deep animosity towards shopping. Martina knows this, so she often shops for groceries alone. I come with her, only if we have a list and I can run through the aisles and grab stuff quickly like there’s a zombie apocalypse happening and we have to stock up on resources. And, hot-damn! Anyone ever been grocery shopping in Korea? Don’t even get me started on shopping cart etiquette. Stop leaving your damn carts in the middle of the aisle and just walking away! Move em to the side! Let people pass! People leave their carts perpendicularly in the aisles so NOONE can pass, because pfffft screw everyone else, right? I don’t want to have to drive through your carts like a snowplow cuts through snow. Just…be considerate of other shoppers! YAAGGGHHH! Costco…Korean Costco…your shoppers are…*shudders*

*breathes into paper bag* I hate shopping.

Ok I’ll stop talking about shopping. I’ll tell you something you didn’t know about this video: we actually had the people over at My Korean Husband over at our studio at the time that we were shooting this. It was the last thing we filmed before going out for the night. They watched us in all our awkwardness, in real life! That’s not the point. Point is: Hugh gave this game a shot after we filmed the video, and he got a lot farther than we did. The game gets progressively harder, and you’re supposed to start pushing two buttons at once for some of the later levels. The two of us didn’t get that far. We lost in the opening stages. I bet I could have done better if I wasn’t being wedgied and wet-willied the whole time. Just saying….

Anyhow, if you want to unlock the next level of DDR, you’re gonna have to click on this button right here! You’ll not only level up, but you’ll get our videos before everyone else! Great success!

  1. You know I read that Uknow wants to invent stuff, you know. Maybe he invented this! Also this is prolly the best keyring ever. I collect keyrings. Keyrings rule!

  2. I want one of those, I love that kind of games. I’m gonna look it up online XP

  3. I would lose so many hours of my life if I owned that thing. I love those kinds of games! They have an app version of DDR (I can never remember what it’s called, so I usually just call it the tap tap game and my friends understand) and oh man, when my roommate first showed me it, I was done for the rest of the night. They were all talking and watching TV and I was just stuck in a corner tap taping away on her phone. So addictive!

  4. It’s just not Korea where the shopping is bad. Here in the Netherlands I try to avoid shopping on Friday or in the weekend, because it makes me want to slap people and punt toddlers.
    Too many people in stores and too many people who have no idea how to make it an enjoyable experience for everyone. I really wonder what goes on in their heads “let me place my cart here so no-one can get to the shelves while I take an hour to pick out the thing I want” or “let me stop in the middle of the aisle when there’s also people to the sides so we’re sure to block the entire aisle” or another favorite is the couples who have to be surgically detached from eachother and never entertained the idea that sometimes they could walk behind eachother instead of insisting to be side to side the entire time.
    Not to mention people with a stroller for their kids who think it is a good idea to use it as a battering ram. I had one person ram their stroller pretty hard into my heels…while I was waiting in line for the store to open…I-it’s not like trying to sever my achilles tendon will make the store go open faster.
    And they are always sure to look at you like you are some weirdo if you move their cart, ask them to stop blocking the aisle or don’t want to make way because they insist on walking side by side.
    Just yesterday there was this little kid blocking the aisle I needed while his mom was standing there laughing like an idiot. At times like those I start debating whether I should dropkick the mom or the kid.

    And yes it should be obvious by now I do hate shopping as well, too busy and as soon as I enter a store it can be -10 degrees celcius and I will still start sweating. And sadly I live alone so I can’t pass it off to anyone. But if I never had to go shopping again it would be too soon.

  5. LOL! Oh Martina, you are so eviiiillllll! This is actually an easier version of the game than the “Simon” (says) old skool game because you just push it as it lights up, in the Simon, you had to listen to the whole sequence and then repeat it and it kept getting longer and faster. Still, takes concentration the ability to not lock up your fingers – good jorb guise!

    I really really liked the visual and sfx at the beginning of the video where Martina mimed playing the Simon game and there were lights and noises in time with her – very cool. But proof that the shot is too close? Kai bai bo is entirely out of the shot now! Your hand movements aren’t distracting, they are part of what makes your videos so expressive and so much fun. I did like the multi-screen effects but I think that the head shot might have worked better on the right side (for Western viewers?) since people tend to go “left-right-left-right” with the eyes which would have people switch back and forth naturally if the main action was on the left but when the main action is on the right, your eyes forget to go to the left – maybe Leigh (who has probably taken some classes on this) could tell me if I’m right on this one or not.

    Simon, I totally agree with you on shopping. I go into a store, immediately size up if I want something I want or not and am in and out in under a minute in some cases. Definitely do not give out personal information at the cash, it’ll just put you on another list. Grocery shopping in large stores like Costco does requires a list or you tend to forget what you went in for and get tired if you have to walk ALL the aisles. I never worked in a mall, but I find window shopping kind of depressing, if I want it, then I want to just buy it right away.

    A thought on last week’s hilarious WTF: just goes to show that if you package something in plastic with a label, it totally legitimizes it, whatever it is. Show up to party with 2 brand new pair of underoos with a string – get lynch mobbed out of there for perversion, show up with it in a package – hero! I was also happy that it was hilarious and PG rated so that my son could watch because he nearly peed himself laughing!

    Cyber_3 – only bought and keeps her PS2 for DDR workouts…….Konami FTW!

    • I’m with you guise on shopping. I could never do the “let’s spend 4 hours buying clothes!” thing. I do like to browse a little, but I’m really done after like half an hour at most. I just want to get what I came for, get in and get out.

      I laughed so hard at your point about the underwear tug of war. It’s so true! If you came up with that idea yourself, your friends would look at you like you were nuts and would be totally freaked out that you showed up and told them to put some strange underwear on their heads.

  6. of course Simon sounds grumpy!! Dothraki man warrior needs his MILK!!
    ahahaha designed by UKnow!! makes sense, it is a dance game!!
    i heard the Pirates of the Caribbean theme song too!!

  7. Oh yes I had a very clear view of that wedgie!

  8. Loos. I have Shake on my iPad and play it when I am home sick. It gets really addictive and hard. And you learn to hate particular songs because they are too hard to play and you never get a high score. My favourite songs are the ones I am awesome on. Like Simon I hate failure.

  9. It’s like Tap Tap Revenge, that gaming app that was ridiculous popular all those years ago. Dooub Inc made a bunch of apps just for K-Pop songs, including SNSD, 2PM, 2NE1, Big Bang, Kara and my favourite TRAX. The only problem is that TRAX Shake doesn’t work with iOS7. //crai

  10. What is this device called ? I want to buy one for my keychain :D

  11. Especially when you get in an aisle with a little old lady on those motorized carts!! Sometimes I think the toughest gang member from the hood would be a breathe of fresh air after running into a granny on a push cart taking up the entire aisle who will cuss you the hell out if you even dare make a comment about trying to get around her. I love the elderly, but I dare not mess with grannies at the grocery store.

  12. Haha this brings back memory’s I play DDR like Martina does. If my friend starts doing to well is an open invatation to tickle him till he isn’t doing so well. He’s crazy good at it though.

  13. Grocery shopping i can handle, but clothes shopping for more than 5 minutes? =Q= u can definitely find me in somewhere in the blanket/furniture aisle at Ross store snoozing while my tongue sticks open like a dead lizard *derp face*

  14. #getmilkforSimon

  15. Oh Simon, I feel your cart pain. The other day I was caged in an isle by two people who decided the middle of the isles was the best place for their carts. Not only that both had kids running a muck which blocked my exit even further. When I finally found a path to freedom the one lady with the most kids looked at me like I was the insane one it here way. I had a basket by the way. Shudders. I hate grocery shopping also but I live alone and my cat refuses to go the store for me so I fight the battle for sustanince.

    • When that happens to me I just go ahead and push peoples carts out of my way. If they are near by they either don’t say anything or say “sorry” like they were totally unaware that they were blocking the entire isle.

  16. What even is the point of that? lol
    And, yes, that was totally Pirates of the Caribbean.

  17. You guys remind me WAY too much of me and my sweetie when it comes to apologies and competitiveness! Did Martina ever try it again?

  18. Martina made the right choice. Milk isn’t that important.

  19. I find Costco to be chaotic wherever you are…

  20. I vote for Martina’s choice, I love rhythm games and am totally lactose intolerant. XD

  21. Hehehe..Martina gave Simon a wedgie :P

Related Latest Trending