This week we review 4Minute’s “Heart to Heart” for Kpop Music Monday and deal with quite possibly the stupidest boyfriend ever.

No, we don’t mean the guy from C.N. Blue. He’s not the idiot. He just plays one in this video. First off, WHO COULD EVER CHEAT ON 4MINUTE?! Ha! There’s Simon’s fanboying moment. Seriously though, we like the Amelie idea that they’re going for, but so many things are just wrong with how it was executed:

1) Couldn’t he feel the sandwich was rock hard before he picked it up? Where did those sandwiches even come from to begin with? How many people have perfectly made sandwiches lying around the house? Is this how rich people live?
2) Why would he shave in the middle of the afternoon for no reason? He’s clearly got no facial hair on him at all. And shaving at some random time fully clothed? I don’t know how other guys shave, but it’s usually before or after a shower, not after a failed snack attempt.

4Minute Heart to Heart Shave

Umm, did they just put Whipping Cream into his can of...WHIPPING CREAM?

3) Maybe this was just a weird continuity error, but why does the guy’s can of Shaving Foam say “Whipping Cream” on it? We were a bit confused by this. Looking at it later on, though, you see that both cans say “Shaving Foam” on them instead. Could be just a boo boo. But how do you put cream into a shaving foam can? Ever use one of those? There’s not like an easy thing to unscrew so you can just dump in some other stuff. But…we digress.
4) Doesn’t he notice the girls across the street from him when he’s looking under the hood of his car? They’re like…RIGHT THERE! If my car malfunctioned, and I saw a bunch of girls giggling at me across the street, especially with one of them HOLDING A TIRE IRON, I’d be a bit more suspicious. I’d like to know what they did to his engine with a tire iron, though…beat the hell out of it?
5) No more comment on him sitting on a box covered in fabric. Wouldn’t he notice that there’s something different in his room? We…we don’t know.
6) Who passes out into a vegetative state from seeing a spider drop down in front of them? I mean, that guy is pretty, sure – but his survival skills are horrendous. Whatever happened to throwing shoes at spiders? That’s how you handle them!

4minute Heart to Heart Photoshopped

Damning evidence that Simon is a gangsta who stoleded the Mona Lisa

7) If a sexy police officer lady walked up to you in a uniform clearly bought from a naughty Halloween shop, and she showed you handcuffs, wouldn’t you think that this is a bachelor party for someone, NOT that she’s a real police officer, and that this was not really something to worry about. Come on! And she’s arresting him for bad photoshopping? Since when is that a crime? If it is enough evidence to get you arrested, you should know that we’re risking jail time here by posting Simon with money and guns and stolen art. If you don’t hear from us in a while, we’ll put up a video of where you can help us cover the bail money. Also, what exactly is he doing in the picture? Climbing a building? We…we’re confused.

But that didn’t stop us from laughing more than we’ve laughed at a video in a long time. We could have just been laughing for the wrong reasons: the guy from CN Blue was a complete toolbag, and his girlfriend is better off leaving him.

Also, we are a bit disappointed with the song. It’s a good song, don’t get us wrong, but it’s not like their other stuff, not the comeback we’ve been waiting for. We mention in the video how “I My Me Mine” was Simon’s favorite kpop song of 2010. It was intense. It had so much energy and just blew us away. “Heart to Heart,” though, just doesn’t seem befitting 4Minute. Maybe it would be better for Sistar? Who knows. We just hope we can hear more bombastic shazaaming songs from 4Minute in the future.

Anyhow, that’s it for now. WHY OH WHY DIDN’T YOU REQUEST “ITAEWON FREEDOM”?!?! That’s the best video we’ve seen all year. It’s not very Kpop-ish, sure, and it’s not really big in Korea now compared to the other big songs…but it’s got the best video we’ve ever seen. TVXQ’s “Before You Go” wasn’t even half as good as this one! Ahh! It probably won’t get voted in, though. Also, JB and Annie from [닉쑤] Enjoy Your Happy Life~* are awesome for so diligently translating all of our videos into Korean. Huzzah!

Also, 4Minute’s new album isn’t out yet, but you can Pre-order the album here. And finally, we’ve received lots of questions and comments about Simon’s T-Shirts (because, let’s face it, they’re awesome). And so we’ll be linking them here. You can find Simon’s shirts over at Threadless.com, or you can get the specific shirt by clicking on ET below :D

Simon's T-Shirt

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