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Sexuality in Korea

July 4, 2013

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Ok, so this topic is a bit difficult for us to talk about, because it’s one that we can really barely talk about at all. Whenever we discuss a topic that we don’t have any experience with, like the one on Dating in Korea, we can only relate what our friends have told us. Having our Korean friends open up about sexuality, though, isn’t really as easy as it is with our non-Korean friends. Maybe it’s a Korean thing. Maybe it isn’t. We’re not sure. All we know is that we kinda feel like elementary school kids again trying to talk about the things they heard about sex. I heard you put your weiner in a girl’s belly button to make babies! EWWW GROSSSS.

Another thing about sexuality as well: we can’t comment on what an entire race of people are like, because sexuality is very individualistic. The habits of a few people don’t represent the habits of everyone. Even if we had first-hand experience with sexuality in Korea and told you those stories, that wouldn’t really be all too indicative of Sexuality in Korea, you know? This disclaimer isn’t exclusive to just this topic of sexuality. Lots of the topics we discuss are just based on our limited experiences, which can vary greatly depending on who you know or where you’ve been. Our marriage is different than many of the marriages you’ve seen or experienced, our diets are different, and our experiences in Korea are different as well. We can only tell stories, and hopefully you find them interesting :D

The only thing that we could really talk about that was distinctly Korean, though is the Love Motel experience, which we haven’t seen anywhere else, really. Love motels are pretty much motels whose main bread and butter is people looking for a place to have sex. Why, do you ask, do people need to go to Love Motels to have sex? Because of real estate prices, that’s why. If you want to have your own apartment in Korea, you have to put down a giant deposit of $10,000-$50,000, sometimes even more, depending on the place. Not a lot of students in high school or university, or even post-university have that kind of dough. We know people in their 30s in Korea still living with their parents.

So what are they gonna do if they want to get it on and they still live with their parents? Some of you might suggest “sneak off into the basement or the bedroom or whatever so long as it’s far from the rest of the family,” but it’s not that easy. People don’t live in big houses here. Most people live in apartments. You gonna sneak off and get it on in a room whose wall is connected to the living room? That’s not gonna happen! Oh you wanna get it on in the garage? You mean, the public garage where everyone else in your apartment parks? NOT HAPPENING, unless…you’re creative…

Hence, Love Motels. A whole business model, a whole small economy, based on ludicrous apartment deposits. The same can be said of coffee shops, which are overrun by people on dates, who don’t want to do something romantic in the company of their parents. DVD rooms exist as well, which are supposed to be for watching DVDs, but are – errr – known for people having sex in them as well. DVD rooms are cheaper than Love Motels, so if you’re horny and on a budget, that’s the place to go!

What’s odd, though, is that sexuality isn’t really that openly talked about in Korea, when it’s pretty much in your face a lot of the time. Isn’t Korea one of the highest consumers of porn in the world? And aren’t there rub and tugs everywhere? We have a friend who is Korean but living in Japan, and she was telling us about the difference between Japanese TV and Korean TV. She was watching a prime-time Japanese TV program, with celebrity guests talking about stuff on some chatterbox program, and one of them was telling a story about what one of his ex-girlfriends liked to do with his shpoonk. To which we all looked aghast and said “That would NEVER be on Korean TV,” but would it be on North American TV as well? Canadian? I don’t think so. American? I doubt it. Mexican? I’ve got no clue. I think Mexico’s more open about its sexuality, for some odd reason. Probably because it’s hotter there. Oh hell I don’t know what I’m talking about.

We haven’t really seen any sex shops in Korea as well, as much as we see them where we’re from. There’s a condom shop in Hongdae that we’ve seen, but that’s about all we’ve seen. When we were in Akihabara, Tokyo, though: HOLY SMOKES SO MANY SEX SHOPS EVERYWHERE. Multi-level sex shops. Whole floors dedicated to penis pumps. We know this only because we had to research them for the sake of our videos, of course. POINT IS: we haven’t really seen any sex shops in Korea.

As for the more juicy details our foreign friends have related about their sexual experiences in Korea, there’s no real trend that we can comment on. Some Korean girls are shy and timid, and carry the “oppa!” thing to an uncomfortable sexual level, and some girls are friskier and more dominant. Some guys are great and some are inconsiderate dolts. It’s no different than sex back where we’re from. Some people are great at it and some aren’t.

Anyhow, we’ll leave the floor open for discussion now, though we’re not sure how to open this up for discussion without turning the comment section into NSFW territory. We didn’t talk about prostitution here in Korea, which is related to sexuality, but entirely deserving of its own post, if the topic of Se7en’s massage parlour experience is something people want us to use as a springboard. Side note: the whole “I went in there without knowing what it was! Oops!” excuse is clearly, irrevocably, undeniably, 100% bullshit :D

And now that we’re done talking about sex and shpoonk on Japanese TV, how about we talk about helping our North Korean refugees? Highly inappropriate! But, it’s our last chance to do so, and we really wanted to raise more awareness for it. We made a Tumblr post about it over the weekend, but we wanted to mention it in a TL;DR video where we think more people would be interested in participating. We didn’t want to talk about it in last week’s TL;DR, since the topic was a bit more sensitive than love motels and Dildi.

The point is, this Saturday we’re going to help raise funds for LiNK. If you’re in the area, come hang out with us and chip in a few bucks if you can! If you’re not in the area, as 96% of you aren’t, yet you want to help out, you can still donate online to the Seoul Rescue Team. Either way, if you’re in Korea or not, we hope that you can participate in this somehow :D

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Sexuality in Korea

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  1. I live in Quebec in Canada and I remember when I was in elementary school, the nurse came for speak about sexuality and give us condoms.Everybody was so shy and uncomfortable. We only have 10 years old!

    1 year ago
  2. Love motels would be pretty cool in America, I think. The only equivalent is really run down, crappy, cheap motels that are more for travel than shenanigans. Too bad that if love motels were a thing in the US, people would have mixed feelings, more on the negative side :(

    2 years ago
  3. See http://thegrandnarrative.com/2012/12/09/ga-in-bloom-female-empowerment/
    and comments in http://seoulbeats.com/2012/10/need-a-man-miss-a-says-forget-about-it/
    about why it is not about true female independence.

    TheGrandNarrative (a great site for Korea socio-culture and feminism reviews) – “while Miss A’s “I don’t need a man” looks like it’s gunning for female empowerment, at the end it’s still feeding into a discourse that men made for a “good girl” or a “sensible woman” in Korea.”

    Seoulbeat’s Best ranked comment among many good ones -“They still frame womanhood as something inherently related to men somehow. Is it really that hard to be independent and assert that independence without talking about a man to be independent from?”

    Additionally, it’s clear from the lyrics that Miss A is talking to a man. Their message isn’t that they don’t need a man at all – their message is they don’t need a man to buy them the basics and exuberant luxuries. Which of course in Western culture comes quite obviously – most guys would expect the girls to pay for their own rent, clothing and handbags. No one wants a girl who leeches off them. The Korean perspective on this is explored in TheGrandNarrative article.

    4 years ago
  4. I am wondering about religion. Are there churches in Korea? Or is it mainly Buddhism?

    4 years ago
  5. There are sex shops in Korea. but they’re very discreet. You have to know what to look for.

    I live in Uijeongbu, and on the main road downtown there’s a sex shop on the 2nd or 3rd floor, but the only way you’d really know it was there is because they put this tiny little yellow sign (it looks like on of those folding signs that say caution wet floor) with simple black lettering saying 성인용품 which literally means ‘adult products’

    4 years ago
  6. LOL! Onf Martina my university had the universal condom bag in the main student union building! I remember walking in on my first day and feeling very awkward lol!! There were also giving out free condoms and pizza at an event on campus! You can now tell simon your right!

    4 years ago
  7. Ely

    What does shpoonk mean? 0.o
    And I think there’s a spelling mistake here: “To which we all looked aghast and said “That would NEVER be on…” :D

    4 years ago
  8. hi Magda….i totally agree..sex exists …..as do all the related issues of std, pregnancy, abuse, etc. whether folks talk about these things or not. so i think NOT talking and making some stuff illegal or hidden is very wrong. very. abortion is illegal in korea, but not hard to get. premarital sex is a ‘no-no’, and culturally unacceptable, but it’s everywhere (try watching a kpop performance and NOT thinking about sexiness). there is a double standard of what is publiclly valued and what occurs privately. to out myself , i’m an adoptive parent of a 25 yr old born in Korea. I’ve been to Korea several times, and have been very involved in the Korean American community. I’ve also worked in women’s health in the US and have been a support of reproductive choice for decades. And I love history /cutlure stuff so I read on these topics a lot. That being said…think of Korean society as like the US in the 1950’s and early 1960’s. Elvis a sexy singer. The “Mad Men” style affairs at the office. pregnant teens living in shame in maternity homes giving up babies for adoption. It doesn’t make sense as there are so many contradictions. That is Korea now. I know little about Mexico….but I’ll bet big city life and small town life are quite different. That is also true in Korea. What goes in Hongdae where Simon & Martina live….drunk club goers making out in their stairwell…..is not so likely in small Korean towns. same in the usa really. but in the end. sex is everywhere, so why would anyone deny information about it? silly really.

    4 years ago
  9. You guise!! I laughed my a** off during this video!! Honestly!! :D

    You sure got a sense of humour!! <3

    And thanks for making these TL;DRs!!!

    4 years ago
  10. I am really glad that the school I went to had Health classes. Sports, hygiene, how to eat healthily etcetera were taught in this class but we were also taught about menstration and birth control. We didn’t always appreciate learning about it and often found it silly but when my period started I was glad I knew what was happening.

    4 years ago
  11. I think you are right Mexico has been adapting a lot, I live in the north bordering with the U.S. so I think you can actually see more and more people being American influenced(?) that people in the south or at least in my experience. In my college there is lot of talk about sex and protection but I think it has to do more with my career than anything else and I have only once seen a campaign of condoms too, they went around giving boxes with 100 condoms with lube and everything to every boy they saw, funny thing they wouldn’t give you one if you were a girl xD But either way its slowly becoming a more and more openly-talked topic for every one.

    4 years ago
  12. you aren’t. usually they dont want you to speak any korean to the students because then they won”t learn. i think they said it in one of their old videos

    4 years ago
  13. Wow I wish I’d seen this before I first moved to Korea.

    I have too many stories both wonderful and horrible related to this topic, so I’m just going to pass on the discussion. I just want to thank Simon and Martina for bringing this up, ‘cuz it’s not something openly discussed in Korea. I really respect the topics you guys have been talking about for TL;DR! Kept it up! :)

    4 years ago
  14. The was one sex shop on Itaewon near the Jeil Entertainment building, I believe it’s moved off the main street, but not sure where. That’s the only one I’ve seen. Stark contrast to Tokyo. Only saw 1 underwear machine in Tokyo, but there was a VHS (dating myself) machine a few blocks from the house. By day, the tinted screen made it near impossible to see what was inside, but at night it was back lit and visible. After a while I figure out that new releases were on top row going for ~$40 and as they got older, moved down until they were ~$10.

    Another topic, my Korean wife will not kiss in public. After 14 years of marriage, a quick peck is the most I will get, in public.

    4 years ago
  15. link fundraiser, kudos for doing something good with your fame and popularity.

    4 years ago
  16. I thought they were going to talk about sexuality, as in, the gay/lesbian/bisexual community in Korea. Was kinda disappointed :/

    4 years ago
  17. Mexico is not open about its sexuality, neither. In fact, I think they are more open about that topic in the US and Canada.

    4 years ago
  18. About birth control in Korea – my co-teacher told me that many high school and college girls take birth control before and during exams so that they won’t have their period during that time. And, as of when I lived in Korea, it was very easy to get birth control in a pharmacy. It was sold without a prescription at a much cheaper price than (American) prescription pills. You may have to put up with judgement from the pharmacist though.

    There is a thread about this over at waygook.org, if anyone wants more practical information.

    4 years ago
  19. There is ALOT OF PROSTITUTION in Korea.
    You should read this article about Korean men and prostitution. It’ll give you a good idea about how things are in Korea. BE AWARE. This article might stop you from idolising Korean men. But remember not every guy in Korea is doing this.

    http://thegrandnarrative.com/2010/01/20/korea-sex-marriage-prostitution/

    4 years ago
  20. Our Korean friend told us that any place called “motel” is considered a love motel, even if it’s just a family run old-style building that doesn’t look sketch at all. So apparently Koreans avoid going to them because of the reputation of the word, even if most that we’ve been to on our travels have been really clean (gotta pick the right ones!). Our friend also said that some motels are changing their names to “hotel” just because of the reputation around the word “motel.” Funny! Oh well, $30 or $40 a night isn’t bad as long as it’s clean, right?

    p.s. Another Korean friend told us that a huge percentage of Koreans consider birth control to be the man’s choice. I looked up some articles about it on the internet, and most of them agreed with that! Crazy! Maybe that’s why women have babies right after getting married? One of my students the other day said that she was a “honeymoon baby” hahaha!!

    4 years ago
  21. OMG THEY USED MY QUESTION! ^_^ this is so cool!!

    also, i’m a boy, lol.

    4 years ago
  22. Kim

    Im vietnamese and i was never had the sex talk at home the only way i learnt was through sex education at high school. The only reason that I know about things like birth control like the pill and condoms is because of school. The only thing my parents ever told me was “Don’t watch porn” literally and that was it. They never talk about these things at home because it is seen as taboo and disgusting. In there minds I should not be “exploring my sexuality” instead I should be studying. Im really grateful of the sex education available at school or I would have went to university knowing nothing about these things.

    4 years ago
    • Hey Kim! It’s cool that you see sex-ed this way, as something important that shoould be talked about. I have a vietnamese friend and she told me the exact same thing about her parents (except for the porn) the only thing different is that her school wouldn’t provide much more info on it.Perhaps you can make things different for YOUR kids(?)!! When I noticed that S&M mentioned Mexico and wondered as to how open it is to sexuality, it got me thinking. I’m Mexican and unlike you, my parents (my mom in particular) explained what sex was (the act) by the time I was in 5th year of elementary school (I was like 10 yrs old back then). I mean she explained the basics as to “how babies are made” and that was it. Later on through school and questions I threw towards her I got more info. I think it’s really important to at least know the basics, later on in middle school and high school I got plenty of info, some from school some from friends (which is very dangerous, cuz they pretty much know as much about sex as you do) and so at least back then I knew how to prevent STDs and pregnancy. I would like to mention, that although some kids may recieve all info by the time they are 15/16, it doesn’t mean they are ready to be “sexually active”, because it requires maturity and responsability. Being a parent is no easy job, becoming a parent at 15/16 (or even younger) must be SUPER DUPER hard (not impossible though). So I speak to you as a 22 yr old girl/woman who has graduated from College and has been able to have all the information about sex at hand, who is till a virgin and is waiting for the right time and right person to experience and exchange that side of my sexuality ;) So I have yet to have more experience at my side P.S: I don’t mean to say that everyone should be/feel the same way I am/feel. This is a free world, just take care!! <3

      4 years ago
  23. Dothraki man warrior’s chest hair is so in-your-face in this video hahahaha!

    4 years ago
  24. It didn’t suprise me the idea of Love Motels because I’m from Argentina and here that really common but We know them as Telos (in lunfardo, Rio Platenese argot, for ‘hotel’: the order of the syllables in words is often reversed, and of course the ‘h’ is silent in Spanish. Every city even the smallest one have at least one of this type of hotel, for example in Buenos Aires (capital) only, there are about 150 pay by the hour hotels, some of them really gross (cheap one) and others really clean.

    4 years ago
  25. I’m sure you guys saw them while you were there, but Japan has love motels all over the place! They even have a special love motel interior design related culture thing going on. They have rooms ranging from regular hotel looking rooms to space themed rooms to rooms that cater more towards particular fetishes. I know this from living there for a bit and having friends who went and I also found it so interesting that I read a book about it. It’s pretty bizarre, but very interesting.

    4 years ago
  26. Well, now I want to learn about prostitution in Korea.

    4 years ago
  27. now i wanna know about prostitution and “message parlor”(Gigitty gigitty boom boom) of korea.

    4 years ago
  28. I don’t know what is shpoonk, i searched it on google but…

    4 years ago
  29. Nic

    My female Korean friends were always surprised when I said I was on birth control. The first thing they say is, “But it’s very bad for your body!” They get a lot of misinformation. It’s really different to here where people go on BC pill for acne, for period pain etc. Korean girls struggle a lot with periods as well it seems. They don’t have the option of BC pills for extreme period pain or period problems, or even seem to realise there is medication for period pain. It’s a shame because some of those problems can be managed if they just knew.

    Also about STDs…. if you go to the doctor in Korea and ask for a STD test they will look at you like you are a dirty disgusting person. It’s really unfortunate because people aren’t getting checked but obviously there are STDs going around. Just really different to here where even going to the doctor for something else and they are doing tests they will throw in a STD test as well, just to check.

    4 years ago
    • Lea

      I had to explain why I was on birth control to my Korean friends. They didn’t understand as I am married and have only one partner. They all saw it as extremely weird and only for those that were promiscuous. When I explained that it was for severe cramps and an irregular cycle, they didn’t realize that it had those benefits.They thought it was simply a contraceptive like condoms.

      When I went to the doctor with one of them (because sometimes things get lost in translation) when they asked if there was a possibility she was pregnant she got upset. I explained that it’s not that they think you did anything, they just want to know before they give you something that would hurt you if you were. It was kind of a culture shock.

      4 years ago
  30. My school is like what you described… we have an envelope filled with condoms on a door down the hall. It’s the health advisors door :)

    4 years ago
  31. I have a korean friends that I think he is tooo open to talk about that or make joke with sexual content. We make joke, and talk his friends experiences, and all that, and one time I say to him Why we always finish our talk about something referred to sex? I asume that is for fun (to him) but well~ I thing I more shy that him in that aspect. But he break that “rules” about korean don’t talk about that =P

    4 years ago
  32. ahahahah massage parlour!!
    bwahahahahahaha that story of you guys scaring the couple is hilarious!!!
    …..what a pick up line!!!
    haha love that CSI comment!!

    man this was hilarious!!! (even more so cos i’m childish!!!)

    4 years ago
  33. There are lots of love hotels in Japan and sometimes people stay there because its cheaper. http://youtu.be/BhE9cbNZtJc

    4 years ago
  34. Some rooms have crazy themes…. http://youtu.be/h34vyv8m_kM

    4 years ago
  35. WANK in love motel please ^^

    4 years ago
  36. I know love hotels are big in Japan too, not sure about China. I know China’s pretty cagey about sexuality too though. The girls can be very shy, guys too, depends on the person though, but mostly I found girls and guys to be more shy. One of the few guys that ever hit on me in China turned out to be Korean anyway XD. Other guys were just, brave/older. Gotta give em props though, since most thought I was Russian. But sex shops in China, I knew of 3 in my city, not big ones, but they existed. There are KTV’s(noraebang) that have line ups of girls who’ll sit with you and drink with you while you sing too, kinda like a host club. Oh, and there are plenty of very obvious whore houses EVERYWHERE. Known as pink houses. They look kinda like hairdressers, which can be confusing lol. And you could see male prostitutes, ‘cock’s as they were nicknamed in the clubs, kinda clumped on one table. Not sure who approaches who in that situation… but sexuality in China is… there but not talked about so much. Like Korea I spose. China has alot of bootleg pron DVD’s too lol.

    4 years ago
  37. Hey Guys I was wondering why don’t you guys make an EYK app? and how about you visit Puerto Rico!!! (^0^)/ *throws Doritos as confetti*

    4 years ago
    • Hi there, there was a plan for an EYK app but it didn’t work out. They are hoping to eventually get one, but at the moment it has been put on the back burner.

      Cheers,
      Natz

      4 years ago
  38. “If CSI came to a Love Motel, it would be like a disco.” buahahahahahahahahahahahaha ROFL!!!

    4 years ago
  39. Disco Love Motel room! LOL.

    4 years ago
  40. oooohhh se7en diss there :’)

    4 years ago
  41. Here in Brazil we also have those love motels you talked about, and in the city I used to live in when I was a child there were A LOT of them. When I first asked my parents what were those, it was kinda awkward ><, not that my parents aren't open about sexuality, it's just that I was really young, and if they tried to explain I wouldn't get it anyway…

    Oh, and this tl;dr was great! I don't know why (maybe I'm too much of a naaasty), but to me it was one of your best!

    4 years ago
    • In my country we got one with a shape of a castle on the outside and then one day when we were passing by on a bus a little kid started yelling to his mom: “Mommy I want to go inside the castle, please let’s go inside the castle!!!” and made a big fuss out of it. Needless to say, the whole scene made my day! LOL xD

      4 years ago
  42. This is so foreign to me; I’m Swedish and I know I had some of my first sex-ed classes in middle school(age 11-13). In junior high we were supposed to put a condom on a cucumber, but we didn’t have enough condoms so the teacher had to do it in front of the class~.(emarrassingly so)

    In upper secondary school the school we had separate sex-ed classes for boys and girls; so that we could ask questions about sexuality, sex and such without getting too embarrased infront of the other sex. She also handed out different kinds of condoms.

    During both junior high and upper secondary school we also visited (I had to look up this “word”, it really sounds like a bad place accoring to my translation…) “social advice and guidance centre for young people” where people up to 25 years of age can get advice, help, condoms, birth control and such. Condoms are handed out free(to promote safe sex) and going there is always free of charge.
    I never had to have the “talk” with my parents, I learned everything I needed to know in school.

    The only place we got any good knowledge of homosexual relationships and such were in the guidance centre, my school really lacked information about it. But other than that I feel it’s really good. I can’t imagine how frightening it must be to not even know about menstruation(considering how painful and terrible it can be…).

    4 years ago
    • Same in Norway^^ Learned everything in school, but can also talk to my mum about everything. We (mum and I)also made sure that my babybrother knew that he could ask us anything he was curious about girls and us bleeding and babies and stuff so that when the time comes he wouldn’t be embarresed by going out buying pads for his girlfirend and how to respect women.

      4 years ago
  43. There are sex shops in Korea, but they are very discreetly hidden. The one that was closest to me was in Sinchon in the huge intersection, on the third floor of the building that houses Twosome Cafe or the one next to it. I asked the owner why there were not very many sex shops and he explained that up until about 5 years prior to that (so about 9 years ago or so) sex shops were illegal in Korea. Before that, people would travel to countries like Japan, or others that are more sexually open, to purchase those types of “supplies.”

    4 years ago
  44. I commented on the Tips and Tricks for Flying to Korea video, it got 500
    likes or so, not sure if you didn’t see it or you can’t answer it but
    here it is again, ‘You guys should totally get intern Leigh to do a TLDR
    on what it’s like to be an international student in Korea! :D’ THANKS
    FOR ALL THE FAB VIDEOS ANYWAY!

    4 years ago
  45. I wanna know more about the mail service in Korea. Me and my friends are from Brazil and we sent a package to YG, but there were so many restrictions! We don’t even know if our package was delivered. Are they really that strict about this? I don’t know, maybe other worldwide fans also have trouble with this when sending things to their idols in Korea.

    4 years ago
    • Yes, it would be great to know the restrictions for anyone who wanted to send fan packages to EYK too.

      4 years ago
      • I know for sure no beef jerky is allowed lol

        4 years ago
        • LOL! Unless you disguise it ;) That one package of disguised jerky was awesome….but probably was very lucky in getting through.

          4 years ago
  46. OH MY! you guy know abouth LINK? that totaly surprised me! I knew abouth them this year after reading Shin Dong Hyuk’s book, and now i’m so happy that you guys are trying to do something to help those that are way to often left appart by the media :) good luck for the fundraising! And I really hope you can talk abouth this subject (prinson camps, refugees condition, etc) to raise the awareness among your fans for your next TL;DR. I’m sure that if every Kpop fan can know abouth what is going on in North-Korea it would be a big step to spread the word and shift the perception like LINK is trying to do.

    p.s: for those who don’t know who is Shin Dong Hyuk, he’s the most know North Korean refugee. took this from his facebook page:

    The only known person born in a North Korean prison
    camp that escaped and survived to tell the tale. Born 1982 in
    total-control zone camp no.14 of Kaechon.

    Biographie:Escape from Camp 14 by Blaine Harden

    Shin Dong-Hyuk was born in 1982 in Camp 14 of Kaechon North Korea. Camp
    14 is a no-exit camp, where prisoners who enter the camp cannot leave
    and must end their life inside. While inside, he witnessed the
    executions of his mother and brother and was himself tortured for 7
    months. Shin Dong-Hyuk knew nothing of the world outside the camp until
    his escape in 2005. He is the only known person born inside the camp
    that escaped.

    Human rights abuses inside Camp 14 and other
    North Korean prison camps: starvation, torture, forced labor, rape,
    forced abortions and murder.

    4 years ago
  47. The Xiah Junsu tag cracked me up so badly

    4 years ago
  48. LOL I guess I am still immature xD I couldn’t help but laugh at nearly everything you said :D

    4 years ago
  49. Just this past weekend my dear little 10 year old niece bounded up to me, and after telling me about her latest favorite tv show, stopped, looked at me very seriously and said, “I got the talk.” Then just waited for my reaction. I suppose my, “Oh, that’s…nice?” response was lacking. Her mother on the other hand just about fell out laughing at my awkwardness.

    4 years ago
  50. XIAH the king of touch me, kiss me and rubbing of bananas highly appropriate use for this TL:DR. BTW the first time I heard Intoxication was when you posted it and it had the English subtitles and never in all my life has a song ever made me blush but Intoxication made my face look like Rudolph’s nose. And I’m in my 30’s! Not mention I grew up with the lewdest guys and girls. Junsu the king of sexuality.

    4 years ago
  51. This is, in my opinion, the funniest TL;DR you guys have ever done. I was laughing so hard, and just love it!

    4 years ago
  52. As for Love motels, they exist in other places besides Korea. I went to college in Tucson, AZ and there is a road full of hotels you can rent by the hour. Famously one is called the “No-Tel Motel”. No seriously that’s its name. Although these particular establishments are more for prostitution than for anything else.

    It seems to me, from a clearly outsider never been to Korea only seeing drama/videos/interviews/articles, that Korea is a bit more conservative in these matters. I don’t believe everyone is that way, but social norms seem to be coy about it and want to hide it. There might be a slow change as more western influences work their way into Korea with younger generations.

    I find it odd that the term “scandal” is used when two stars are dating. Scandal? Really? Now visiting a “massage” parlor while on activity duty? That’s a scandal. In the west it’s a big deal that two stars are dating, but more of an exciting this is cool news kind of way, unless it’s cheating then all bets are off.

    4 years ago
  53. I know this video is kind of embarassing, but hasn’t embarassing and awkward always been funny? I know it was in my experience of sex education lessons. Anyway, I really loved this vid! Really entertaining ^_^

    4 years ago
  54. Martina, are you guys going to go see Metallica along with other amazing bands in august? It seems awesome<3

    4 years ago
  55. It seems like almost everywhere students either have sex education too early or the classes are really awkward. I’m from Finland and we had sex education when we were in 8th grade and it wasn’t awkward at all. :)

    4 years ago
  56. Seriously the Netherlands is really open in sex… I accidently went to the dam… Sex shops everywhere o.o

    And my brothers were 10 then and they didn’t understand a thing… Just too funny. But in my school it isn’t normal to talk about it. I only had a very perverted college and she and another guy tried to make me less innocent… didn’t work ^3^

    4 years ago
  57. Is this why people are getting their knickers in a twist over Dal Shabat’s Be Ambitious? They are openly expressing their desire to have sex which seems like a big no no especially after reading that article about Man of Korea…

    4 years ago
    • This. And quite honestly, unless the concept came from the girls themselves, I wouldn’t hail it as a feminist anthem; more like cashing in on the latest trend >_>

      4 years ago
    • haha really? honestly i thought the song was just like the girl isn’t getting any sex out of the relationship and she wants her boyfriend to express his love physically. They could have done without the ‘look at my legs not my eyes’ though…I like the song but It was a bit shocking when I first read the lyrics lol

      4 years ago
      • Isn’t there one line where they say something about the lack of sex is gonna make some other guy steal them though? That’s a bit of a messed up relationship lol.
        In the end, it just kind of feels like they’re saying “society is gonna call me a slut, so you have to make the first move so it’s okay.” That doesn’t really feel like progression in female empowerment to me ya know? Well anyways I’ve heard many Rihanna songs with the same message so it’s not like I’m shaming them or anything.

        4 years ago
  58. I’d seen mostly Korean people are open to sexual confrontations *insert schoolgirl giggle here* with Caucasian or other Asians. I’d never really heard of it with Blacks or Hispanics. So basically I was wondering if they fool around with those races?

    4 years ago
  59. So about that LiNK thingy you guys are doing, it’s supposed to help North Korean refugees that make it to the South, right? From what I know though, the South Korean government already had such a program that helped refugees reintegrate into society and helped them with money and everything. I know this was going on in the early 2000’s, has it been abolished?

    4 years ago
  60. Japan has love motels too! And I think for much the same reason as in Korea (privacy from family, roommates, etc.)

    4 years ago
  61. Lea

    A question I have that is sort of geared toward this topic… Do fans (serious ones who are not sasaeng but still scary to me) really feel like their “oppas” are theirs and have never ever had sex? I mean we have idols like Taeyang who says he has never had a girlfriend and supposedly got his first kiss for an MV. Do you really think that he hasn’t? I mean he is in his 20s with raging hormones and a celeb who could have a girl in a heartbeat. I don’t find it plausible.

    4 years ago
    • there are two people in kpop where i’m sure they are not lying: Seohyun and Taeyang.
      Seohyun because she was ALWAYS blushing on WGM when Yonghwa made compliments or tried to do skinship. And she is extremely awkward around guys.
      Taeyang…oh boy, i’ve never seen someone so awkward/shy around girls like him. Especially after watching an interview with him and Dara, where he tried to flirt with her (and she showed 0 interest). I felt sorry for him because…well you could see that he has not much experience.

      4 years ago
    • Hmm… Don’t know if trolling or serious XD *ahem* Anyway, you know you don’t have to have had sex with someone to have dated them, right?

      4 years ago
    • Nic

      I think the answer is somewhere in the middle. But remember it’s not good to approach things with our own cultural view and think “that’s impossible, a guy like that MUST be having sex” because in our culture it’s like that.

      You really don’t know and it is plausible for guys who don’t really have that much time and privacy to not have much experience with girls.Talking to my husband and other Koreans about this type of thing, they don’t think it’s unusual for an idol to not have much experience.

      4 years ago
      • Lea

        Oh I agree to an extent. I think that here in the US, sex is introduced to teenagers and is generally the age where those who are going to take the plunge start to experiment. I know that with Korea the school system and structure of their every day lives make it difficult for normal teens let alone idols/trainees with super packed training/broadcasts/practices/etc schedules have time for the bowchickawowwow. That being said I still find it hard to say that a 25 year old guy hasn’t say experienced some sort of sexual gratification at this point. I am not saying that he is super experienced. (In fact I have theories on all members of BigBang when it comes to the bedroom being a VIP myself) However, I find it difficult to think he has had none.

        4 years ago
        • Interested in sharing those theories? I don’t get to talk to a lot of VIPs since most of them are a bit delusional when it comes to their fantasizing so I just end up avoiding them lol. But I’m curious about yours, I’m sure you’re not the typical teenage fangirl haha

          4 years ago
        • Lea

          LOL! Well definitely not “teenage” fangirl. That milestone passed years ago. I will hesitantly put my thoughts out there. Keep in mind rabid fangirls, I am no expert. I do not claim to know the boys (yes they are boys to me… except T.O.P… he can call me noona anytime and still be a man!)

          Personally, I think that GD and SeungRi are the adventurous type. I think it’s likely that they are not only sexually active, but actively sexual. I think SeungRi probably started at a young age back home and pretty much has his game down pat. Does that mean I think he is awesome in bed? Eh… I don’t know. I kind of feel that he thinks he is all that in bed, but may be just be fair-to-middlin’ to borrow a Southern phrase. Eh. It’s a crap shoot. GD I think had girlfriends and experimented but never sealed the deal until later in life, after debut. I think that he has spent time in countries that are more accepting/in your face with sex and probably dabbled a little. I think that he is super sensual and knows it. He comes across as the type to know how to really sweep you off your feet and serve you a pretty scrumptious dessert too.

          The other three are more tricky. I think Taeyang has maybe had 2-3 partners, but nothing that is serious. I think this is more of an exploration time for him. I don’t think he is a virgin, but definitely a novice. I think he wants to be more experienced and all, but I think he is very conscientious of his image, of expectations, and his own moral compass. I think he is super sweet and genuinely wants to make more of a love connection too. I think Daesung is probably the type that sex means more than just sex to him. I think given his devoutness to his religion and his authentic good guy personality, that he is a) a virgin (not likely even though I still give it as an option) or b) had a serious relationship in which he felt comfortable taking that next step. T.O.P (my boo) I find in paradox… I think that he is sex on legs in my eyes. I don’t think that’s how he sees himself however. I think he has body image issues. I think he knows that people tell him he is handsome and everything… but eh I am not sure he quite agrees. Still, I think he has had a few partners. I think he sees sex as sex and not that connection that us women generally tie to it. I think he probably prefers super models who are glamorous and perfect, but some how see his encounters probably being done in the dark with anonymity.

          Alas those are just thoughts I have. I could be completely off base and all of them are innocent as the day they were born. Don’t murder me fangirls… I am simply a fan too! *goes in the corner to die because all the thumbs down this will get*

          4 years ago
        • Sorry for replying so late, I haven’t logged in my Disqus account in a long time :S Oh that’s interesting! Actually, I’m kinda glad to know that good dance moves don’t always correlate to good abilities in bed LOL x) It’s just…it was very uncomfortable for me to accept the possibility that Jimin might be experienced in bed because of his awesome sensual dance moves. I mean he’s just a 17 year old kid and he’s so dorky and adorable off stage (like seriously, off stage he’s a little squishy softie ball of cuteness…I can’t believe he’s the same beastly guy on stage) I just…couldn’t believe he could be experienced in bed, even though his dancing style is indeed very sensual for his age. So…IDK why, but it made me happy that you shot down this theory lol XD

          Yeah, you’re right…you need way more than good dance moves to be a good lover ;)

          Oh by the way, Bangtan Boys will have their comeback on September 11th! I can’t wait, all of their teasers have been sooo damn awesome! I hope they do well. They have great potential! Definitely the best rookies of 2013! <3

          3 years ago
        • Not to worry. Your boy is probably just an instinctively good dancer and is imitating moves he’s seeing from more experienced performers. Of course, if he were from the USA I’d tell you he’d most certainly be “gettin’ busy” by 17, but I gather that kids aren’t quite so fast in Korea.

          I couldn’t find many clips of him dancing though. Got any suggestions?

          3 years ago
        • IKR?! He’s a little fluffy ball of cuteness/innocence, indeed! That’s why it’s so hard for me to believe he would be experienced, despite the way he dances. So yeah, he’s most likely just imitating the likes of Taeyang and Rain.

          LOL so true…GD definitely has experience, he even brags about it on his songs XD The vibe I get from Jimin is very different from the vibe I get from GD, Seungri and others. Jiminie is just too adorkable…I just want to squish him and pinch his baby cheeks :3 LOL I think he has become my favorite dongsaeng XD When I watch him on Bangtan’s video blogs, most of the time I go all like “Awwww can I adopt him? PLEAAAASE?! :3” I mean, in one of their latest video blogs he was playing with a music box…a music box! Can he get any more adorable than this? => http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VAgXKs7ZNFw

          I hope not…otherwise he will kill me from a cuteness overload lol XD

          3 years ago
        • Yeah, he’s frankly a little TOO young and sweet for my tastes. I prefer more “bite,” but then I’m probably a lot older than you are. I’ll just stay over here in my corner and drool over Rain. :)

          3 years ago
        • Well, my ultimate bias would have to be TOP. I’m not really a fan of abs or muscular guys and TOP can be sexy without revealing an inch of skin, it’s enough with his voice and eyes :) He’s also got a really interesting personality. So… despite my soft spot/noona feels for adorkable Jimin, TOP is still my first option he he :) Being a TOPstan isn’t easy, though. That man is like a friggin ninja, I miss him so much :/
          I hope he comes out of his cave soon…

          Well, it has being nice talking to you :)
          Let’s both keep drooling over our biases! XD

          3 years ago
        • hahahaha oh my!! yeah I have heard of BTS but aint familiar with their dance moves sorry *most lookup though for general knowlegde*…..well a few of my friends who are dancers told that little tip quoting “almost like when male birds want to mate, they have to bust some moves to get the girl!!”…..on the other note maybe I just have really weird friends O_ó

          4 years ago
        • LOL Well, it sounds like a crazy/weird theory at first, but I think it does make sense…kinda ha ha! XD To be able to tell a guy’s level of experience with the gigity just by looking at the way he dances…interesting! LOL XD

          Oh, now I will always be thinking about this “theory” every time I see someone dancing lol

          4 years ago
        • Wow, I agree with most of what you said. Although I do have a different idea about TOP kinda (TOP is my bias too btw…well, I think it’s obvious if you look at my DP :P). I agree with what you said about TOP having body image issues. And he’s definitely had a few partners before (and now too, probably) but… I don’t know…to me TOP seems to be similar to Daesung in a way. They both seem to be very discreet and reserved. And TOP also seems to be very…uhm…sensitive/sentimental. So, it’s hard for me to believe he would think of sex as just sex. I think he’s also the type to look for a love connection just like Taeyang and Daesung. I’ve always thought that Taeyang, TOP and Daesung are sort of similar in this aspect. While on the other hand GD and SeungRi are definitely the adventurous type.

          About TOP preferring glamorous/perfect super models, well…I don’t think he would be very picky regarding looks. However, he does seem to be VERY picky when it comes to the personality of women. I think, if he doesn’t like the girl’s personality he wouldn’t pursue her even if she’s the most glamorous/perfect supermodel around. I mean, he seems to have a really weird and excentric personality (Bingu TOP, anyone?) and this coupled with his body image issues is why I think he tends to pay attention to the girls’ personalities more than anything else. Since he apparently does not feel very comfortable with his looks/body image, I don’t think he would be the kind of guy who demands for perfect looks/appearance in his partners. IDK, he just doesn’t strike me as that kind of guy. And something about him tells me that he’s probably also afraid of being judged by a girl, because of his weirdo/bingu moments. So, this is why I think he focuses more on personality than looks. He tends to look for girls/women whose personality is more akin to his or at the very least, girls/women who are tolerant and not so judgemental (which is probably why he has a thing for older women? lol, IDK). Looks would come second for him, I think. But anyways, these are only the impressions I’ve got from his interviews and appearances in variety shows. But I do agree with the rest of your comment ;)

          4 years ago
        • Lea

          Eh… fair enough assessment. I think that it is possible that T.O.P wants to make a similar kind of sentimental connection with sex. However, I just don’t see that in his life right now. I see it more as boy has needs and he gets them taken care of. Sure he wants/craves that extra bit, but who doesn’t really? At the end of the day I think T.O.P is a bit of a cynic as well as eccentric. I think a lot of the reason he is withdrawn/more reclusive is not just because of his 4D personality but as he is kind of jaded.

          I totally agree with you about paying attention to a girl’s personality, but I think it becomes more important as to what places they hold in his life. A vapid silly little thing may be a one hitter quitter, but the girl who gets him… well I see that more being an ongoing thing. I still think he has the knowledge of his own sexiness in the eyes of others, so the judging thing… I don’t think that is a real concern. I personally believe that T.O.P is knows he is the only one that sees himself as inadequate. Personal demons and all are personal after all.

          This is just my take.. I also think T.O.P is a neat freak and would rather have sex standing up with just his clothes undone not off because he only has time for quickies and really doesn’t want to mess up the sheets or his hair for that matter. *side note: I totally have ideas on what each and every member of BB is like in bed! LOL*

          4 years ago
        • Oh well, I see we have very different ideas on TOP lol. I’ve never really thought of him as being cynic. IMO, Seungri is the cynic. I just don’t see TOP being a cynic like Seungri…. I also think TOP is very careful in choosing his partners, I mean, If he were the kind of guy to pick up any kind of girl just to satisfy his needs or a one hitter quitter…I think he would have already had a sex scandal long time ago, just like Seungri’s scandal. This is what makes me think that he pays attention to the girl’s personalities more than anything else, since this would allow him to know if the girl he’s interested in is actually trustworthy, and he can be sure that said girl is not going to do to him what that other girl did to Seungri.

          I don’t really see him being too much of a player (like GD and Seungri). What I think is that he’s had several girlfriends/serious relationships and some one night stands, but I don’t think he goes as far as Seungri or GD. And again, for these “one night stands” he would have been very careful with the girl he chose. I also think that he may be in a serious relationship now. You know, since he’s MIA lately…I think he has enough free time to be involved in a serious relationship, since currently Bigbang is not promoting as a group and I don’t even know if his movie will even come out this year.

          And about TOP being a neat freak, I agree. But I’m not sure about him having sex standing up, because I haven’t really imagined him having sex in such a detailed way so…I honestly have no idea about which may be his favorite sex positions LOL XD But what you said makes sense, it could be that way lol :P

          EDIT: Actually, now that I think about it…TOP and Se7en seem to be REALLY good buddies. And Se7en has turned out to be one of the most cynic kpop idols, so…Yeah, now I can kinda understand why you would think of TOP as being cynic. I hadn’t really thought about this before…hmmm…I know it’s unfair to think TOP is the same as Se7en just because they’re friends but still…I have my doubts now.

          FML, now you really made me wonder…Is it possible that TOP may be just as or even more cynic than Seungri? O.o

          4 years ago
        • Lea

          Yeah I follow them as far as official interviews and appearances and some minor fan stuff…but I don’t delve into the super fan accounts that are way long. Eh, I want the stuff that comes out of their mouths not hearsay per say.

          Yes, I am married. My husband takes my love for T.O.P in stride. I think it helps that he is across the world and there is that language barrier there. LOL Plus, I think he thought it would be a phase (I tend to be the type of person who loves something hardcore and then moves on to the next thing…didn’t happen with Korean things though… year 3 or 4 and still obsessed!) but now has just come to accept it. He has his guns and I have my Kpop. LOL

          4 years ago
        • i don’t know why but i think you are cute. how old are you though?

          4 years ago
        • Lea

          Thanks… I think. I am 26, soon to be 27.

          4 years ago
        • LOL thanks for sharing your story! It’s awesome to get to know an older VIP, usually the ones I come across are very young, too young for me to relate to haha. Thanks again for the convo, I might lurk around the EYK comment section a little more next time ^^

          And I think for a lot of husbands/boyfriends of Kpop lovers, your story is pretty similar lmao!

          4 years ago
    • If you talk to Korean fans or search different gossip blogs, so I’ve heard, you’ll find out a lot of Korean fans know for a fact multiple stars are not as innocent as they claim. However these fans want to protect their oppas and unnies so they might just say as the trend is Idol A slept with Idol B or things of that nature. They will very rarely give names. Mind you not all of the blogs are true or can be trusted. My info could be wrong or off and I am a VIP myself. I’ve heard accounts from three years back of Taeyang having a girlfriend. I’ve heard GD is quite the player. We all know Seungri isn’t innocent. Apparently Top is BIGBANG’s Siwon. Meaning both are waiting for the right female. Daesung has dated but no one ever says if it was serious. None of the oppas and unnies are as innocent as they try to come across. Some may be virgins but I don’t think it’s as many as the industry believes.
      One thing I was shocked Simon and Martina didn’t touch on is car dates. A lot of people think when celebs go on secret car dates, they could be “sleeping around” in the cars. I was shocked to hear that was a thing, especially since here on my side of the world that’s considered to be very um, not dignified. However, they can’t trust hotels not to call the tabloids. They can’t trust other people. How else are they supposed to get together without the papers finding out.

      4 years ago
    • Or, you know, he could just not have kissed anyone before that. -___- It’s not like people HAVE to date or HAVE to have sex just because they know a lot of good looking people. Sure, either of the options that you listed could be true, but calling him a liar when he could very well have just chosen not to do those things is pretty rude. People’s personal choices should be respected, whether they’re out having sex with a lot of people or not having sex at all.

      4 years ago
      • Oh, okay. I guess I just read the comment you wrote in a negative way? But thank you for clarifying, and I apologize if I came of rude to you in any way in my reply. :)

        4 years ago
    • the medium age for the first sexual relashionship in korea for Man is 21 and women 24.So it would not surprise me if it was true that he never kissed a girl before.

      Other stats: They have sex aproximatly 66 time a year. 27% of the man had sex before 19 years old, 8% for the women, and 45% of man between 20 to 40 years old had their first relation with a prostitute (that one shocked me Oo…) these stats come from this website: http://www.sexeautourdumonde.com/#/jour/coree/

      It’s only in french, i’m sorry abouth that :S

      4 years ago
    • Lea

      LOL! I am pretty sure it’s option A, but that’s speculation either way. I mean maybe he hasn’t had sex, but that’s a big pill to swallow.

      Also another kind of offshoot question, do people/fans think that celeb couples are chaste as well? I mean clearly they aren’t with all the baby making then wedding announcements, but say for example Jonghyun and Shin Se Kyung or Junhyung and Hara… Do we think it’s all hand holding and pecks on the cheek (I fully do not believe either stopped at 1st base! Yes Martina I use bases too!)?

      4 years ago
      • Please >_> If I had someone like Hara or Shin Se Kyung (or even Jonghyun, because I do not discriminate based on gender ;D), I would *not* keep things at first base. Idol life is crazy stressful, Lord knows these peeps do more than relax in their dorm rooms in their free time XD

        4 years ago
  62. Haha, the weirdest / funniest thing happening to me in Korea was in a club in Hongdae where I was dancing with a korean guy and then after like 30 minutes dancing he said ‘Bathroom Bathroom’ And I didn’t quite understand at first but then he said ‘Let’s have sex’ and then I understood… and left the club after another 1~2 hours of dancing.. But I must admit he was quite considerate to some extend, my shirt was very loose and would fall off my shoulders (I had a tanktop under it tho) and I always pulled my shirt back on my shoulders.. after like 4 times or so, he pulled it up regularly.. :’3 I thought it was cute but maybe that’s just me. xD

    4 years ago
  63. This was hilarious and awkward all at the same time but the frosting on the cakes is definitely the “Tagged as: Xiah Junsu” Ohhhhh You so NASTY!!! Just beautiful guys xD

    4 years ago
  64. I feel really bad for my children. Like *really* bad… I’m going to be the *most* awkward parent ever XD I have a habit of talking in weird euphemisms and double entendre. So yeah… Kids, go talk to your mother!!!

    Anyway… I find this topic really interesting. Once you really get past the flower and cupcake phase of K-Pop that a lot of people seem to go through (ya know, the one where you think K-Pop isn’t as bad pop music where you come from), you really start to see how much the sexy is shoved in your face. I guess it’s because K-Pop is a bit more discrete about how sexual it is (in North America, sexuality is all up in your face, and you can’t escape it), but once you see it, you can’t “unsee” it. Like seriously XD

    EDIT – Excuse while I let my ratchetness out for a second *ahem* DAAAAAAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMMMMMMMNNNNNNNNNN!!!!! THEY HARDCORE SHADED THE MESS OUT OF SE7EN!!!!! THAT DUDE AIN’T KNOW WHAT HIT HIM!!!!!!! *ahem* Thank you ^^

    4 years ago
    • I think the difference I see is that in Kpop- they’re hip thrusting, pole dancing, and wearing next to nothing, while also pretending to be completely innocent. It’s understandable that it’s usually the company that pushes the concept and image on a group, but it’s not like anyone can pretend they are some holy virgin compared to North American or Western artists.

      In the western music scene I feel like people are just more accepting on of the fact that sex is apart of society and culture. Sex doesn’t sell because it’s some crazy drug and dehumanizes people, it sells because people can relate to it or humans are just naturally attracted to certain things. Kpop is 80% visuals and fangirls won’t deny that their bias is a sex god until they’re compared to an American artist.

      Personally, I like that Kpop is so sexually and visually appealing. I think it hits a lot of marketing point. The actual quality of music is debatable though, but it’s not like Kpop is rooted off outstanding musical compositions or anything. I just wish it wasn’t such a “do something, then deny it” type of situation *side eyes at Ga In*

      4 years ago
      • I lost so much respect for Gain when I heard about that -_- I simply cannot when idols or agencies make something extremely sexual, and then deny it when they get called out for it. In the long run, it makes you look like a bunch of pansies. I know that the agency is just doing what’s good for it’s brands so they can keep making money off them (they are companies, and that’s what companies do), but… You *can* do it in an ethical manner, ya know XD You do something raunchy, you own up to it. These idols do *not* look innocent touching themselves in a very suggestive manner (no matter how you try to spin it XD), and deep down, you know you want them so badly because they make you feel all tingly on the inside. It’s okay to admit it. Tumblr (which probably houses 90% of International K-Pop fans) has, which is why you see ships on most band tags :3

        4 years ago
        • Not easy to find what you are talking about with Ga In on the ‘net, care to elaborate? Is it that video “Bloom”? I found that by accident and really liked it, I was like “Finally, being honest about it!” I’m not on tumblr, so what the heck do you mean by ships on band tags? Sailing ships? Rocket ships? Huh? Thanks in advance.

          4 years ago
        • Wow thanks for the info. About the PSY video, that is just weird all around and so “not the drama” that I wouldn’t have guessed that was the issue you were talking about. And I guess that I just don’t discuss relationship on tv/drama/whatever enough on the ‘net to have seen that meme.

          4 years ago
        • It just made me quirk an eyebrow and roll my eyes, because that response is so typical. She knew exactly what she was doing throughout that music video, and she has enough star power that if it really did bother her, she could have told PSY and the video director no.

          4 years ago
  65. At my university we take things a step farther and have things like sex forums, where people discuss all things related to sexuality, host porn screenings, and have parties where penis and booby shaped cookies are served…Go Blue?

    4 years ago
  66. I’m Mexican and I can confirm we’re more open about sexuality,and indeed,the hot weather is a fact that has something to do with it XD. We have some morning shows that even invite sexologist to talk a bit about the topic; the telenovelas (tv soap operas) also show making-love scenes between the characters,no matter the schedule. Kids understand very well that that is just another stage of the relationship (kids just don’t know about “coitus”,only that two people in bed is the way to make babies, lol). We also have special tv shows about sex,in certain channels. Not a ton of sex shops.but there are some here. Colleges also give free condoms,etc. Porn is legal here,for +18 of course.

    We reach the idea that sexuality is part of us and trying to put it aside it’s like maim ourselves. Only problem us that lot of teenages are sexually active since 14 or 15, and teen pregnancy rate is high too. I heard single mothers are not really well seen in Korea,but here are very respected and goverment has also given financial support to them. Here,the “shotgun wedding” term is very old and it’s not used anymore. Couples that conceive a child before marriage can spend lot of time unmarried. We also understood that getting married just for a baby can be one of the biggest mistakes in society.

    Ok,I’ve said enough related to my country,hope you read it and and find it interesting :D

    4 years ago
    • i’m surprised that teen pregnancy is so high in Mexico.Don’t parents teach their kids about prevention??

      my mexican friends told me that guys usually don’t want to get married so they just leave the girl alone and the kid has to grow up without a father. that’s really sad imo :(

      4 years ago
    • I agree with you that Mexico is more open to sexuality than Korea, but the problem is that many parents aren’t open to talk with their children about sexuality. In my opinion, I think that one of the reasons why so many teens are pregnant in Mexico and also Mexicans who live in the US is because the only sex they see is in the telenovelas and parents don’t talk to them about that. I can’t say for sure because I only live in the US but from what I have seen as a Mexican living in the United States this is the problem. If you have anything else to add please feel free to do so! :)

      4 years ago
    • jajaja iba a comentar pero ya lo has dicho todo, saludos desde, cozumel :3

      4 years ago
  67. In Venezuela, there are Love Motels but they’re just called motels. There are a couple called Hotels ( they’re fancier and have theme rooms and stuff…idk) and you can rent the hour or night. I don’t know about vending machines with sex toys but I’ve seen sex shops in malls.

    4 years ago
  68. Love Motels are quite popular here in Venezuela too.. i mean i don’t think as much as SK love motels though, they do have like different themes for the each room, to enhance the experience xDD hahaha!! i haven’t actually gone to one, but a friend of mine went and she told me that it was pretty cool, with mirrors on the ceiling and a bunch of stuffs xD .. and about sexuality here, well we got sex education class around 6th grade, that is when we are 11-12 years old here.. just before entering high school~ i think we are pretty comfortable talking about sex here, i mean personally i talk with my friends (guys and girls) about it, and with my mom too, i think that is very important, with my dad is awkward but i have no problem talking with my mom about it~ ^^ but it’s not everyone cause i have some friends who don’t talk with their moms about it.. so it’s like u said.. it’s different for everyone!

    4 years ago
  69. Lea

    I have found that my friends who moved here from Korea or are here studying from Korea ask me tons of questions they were too shy to ask their Korean friends or parents about. I didn’t take it that they meant that I was waaaaaay more experienced than them (tbh married the only person I ever had sex with! booyah!). I just took it as here in the US we are more comfortable and more approachable about the subject. It’s like no judgement would have been passed if they asked about things like masturbation and/or sexy times with folks. Also safe sex was a HUUUUUUUGEE convo with some of them. It’s not that they didn’t know the dangers but more like wanted clarification on best options for them. In the end, I felt glad I was there to help them, but wished they had had that sort of relationship available back home.

    4 years ago
  70. There is a really great blog about Korean sexuality and feminism called “The Grand Narrative”. There is even a post about
    contraception. It’s written by a foreigner, but he lives and works in Korea, has a family in Korea, and gets help with the blog from his Korean wife. It’s really interesting to read, so maybe check it out?

    http://thegrandnarrative.com

    4 years ago
  71. I remember in the dorms, someone stole the whole bucket of condoms……..

    4 years ago
  72. sal

    Hahahaha this video cracked me up.

    You guys are hilarious hahahahahahahaha

    4 years ago
  73. OMG TAGGED AS XIA JUNSU…YOU SO NASTYYYY

    4 years ago
  74. I was already disappointed that you didn’t mention DVD rooms in the video, but in the blog post you do so yay~ I know a lot of people who watch your videos and plan to visit Korea (and go clubbing) and they don’t know what those are so…i hope they understand that now xD

    Also the Se7en reference was awesome.

    4 years ago
  75. I’m always interested in sexuality in different cultures so thank you for this video. ^^ (my major is culture studies haha) Sexuality really depends on the culture. I watched this documentary called “The Sunny side of sex” recently and woah the difference between open Cuban and not open at all Chinese.
    As for Japan, as I’m going to go there soon for a long time I’ve recearched things a bit and for example it’s the same thing with birth control pills over there. You might not even be able to get them from every hospital. In their eyes it’s dangerous to use them. (also might be the idea of youngsters having sex omg)
    Since I’m a Finn I must say that even though we are ok with nakedness (blame sauna) we are surprisingly not that open with sexuality. I think that’s because of the roots of Christianity and when it was a sin to think dirty things! It’s not like that with most of the people but it is hard to make the thoughts go away that fast.

    4 years ago
    • But actually China is slightly open about sexuality? ^^ There’s a whole mall for sex toys in shanghai, so in that aspect they’re more open than Korea xD

      4 years ago
      • China is a huge country and the documentary was only about one specific village so that’s why they weren’t so open about talking about their experiences. ^^’

        4 years ago
  76. once i read about a college that had a ‘condom fairy’. you’d write a note to the condom fairy and stick it in the box and the next day there would be a little draw string baggy at your room with 2 or 3 condoms, lube and a pamphlet about safe sex lol

    4 years ago
  77. Martina! how is Korea with actually errr… purchasing birth control in there.?
    Like, pills and stuff.

    4 years ago
    • I now live in Korea and have been on birth control here for about 8 months. At first, I thought you needed a doctor’s note and went to a local hospital to get one. They got kind of mad at me at first, and I didn’t understand why until I realized that they thought I was making them do unnecessary work since you actually don’t need a doctor’s note for birth control. Lesson learned. I’m on Meliane (멜리안, sounds like mel-lee-ahn) and it costs 10,000 won a pack. From my experience, birth control is extremely easy to obtain and cheaper too. Much more convenient than the states. ;P

      4 years ago
    • You might like to know that buying birth control was banned in Korea until 2006, so that’s kind of why women don’t really know about it. There is a really interesting blog post you might like to read! It doesn’t really explain your question, but it talks more about the social ideas around the pill.

      http://thegrandnarrative.com/2008/12/10/why-korean-girls-dont-say-no-contraception-commercials-condom-use-and-double-standards-in-south-korea/

      4 years ago
      • Thank you for the link and kind words about my blog Paige. But let me please clarify something: *buying* birth control wasn’t banned in Korea until 2006, *advertising* it was, although an exception was made in 2004 for a public campaign to encourage condom use, for the sake of preventing HIV/AIDS.

        Since then, the pill has regularly been advertised on TV, but not condoms. That all changed just last week though, when Durex Korea rolled out (sorry!) Korea’s *first* ever TV commercials for condoms! http://thegrandnarrative.com/2013/06/29/korean-women-condom-use/

        4 years ago
        • I was actually in Korea visiting my boyfriend when that commercial came on. I was surprised because it was in Korea, and when my boyfriend saw it I swear his mouth was hanging open. He said he’d never seen a commercial for anything sexual before on Korean TV.

          4 years ago
        • Oh! Well, thank you for very much for clarifying, sir, because I was honestly under the impression that birth control was banned. But now I know, and for that I thank you!

          4 years ago
        • You’re welcome, and no need to call me “sir” — you make me sound very old! (Although I guess 37 *is* very old compared to most commenters here ㅠㅠ)

          4 years ago
    • Well, I’m not Martina:) but I have purchased bc pills in Korea. They sell them in the pharmaceries and for some of them you don’t need doctor’s prescription (for example Mercilon). You just go to pharmacery, ask for them and pay (when I bought them they weren’t to expensive, 1 pack of Mercilon costed me 6-7$ depending on pharmacery, though it was back in 2010). They are called “pi-im yak” in korean (or you can just try and ask for concrete brand, before on internet I found a list of bc pills you can buy in Korea, many of them have same names as abroad).
      I hope I helped :)

      4 years ago
  78. “if the topic of Se7en’s massage parlour experience is something people want us to use as a springboard.” SPRINGBOARD, SPRINGBOARD!!

    4 years ago
  79. Ummm, kinda on a related topic, does anyone happen to know if birth control is prescription yet in korea? I’ve heard mixed messages, and since I’m leaving to Korea to teach at the end of the month, it’d be nice to know.

    4 years ago
  80. When will KMM be out? Still waiting for it~ but then, no rush. :) You guise should really sleep. It’s 4.30am there. It’s 3.30am here…@_@ studiesssss….Goodnight guys~ <3

    4 years ago
  81. Hi there, Martina, you look like you got a tan–did you get a tan? :D

    4 years ago
  82. Sex shops get more common the closer you are to military bases. Out in the less populated areas of Korea I’ve seen lots of them on busier streets.

    4 years ago
  83. LOL that se7en call out
    BAHAHAHAHAHAHA
    i cant-

    4 years ago
  84. It definitely seems odd to think that High School kids don’t date until you look at the crazy pressure they are under to succeed at school. Good luck with the fundraiser this Saturday btw.

    4 years ago
  85. My mom wants me to marry a guy like Simon. She’s told me that she’s prayed for me to meet my very own Simon.

    4 years ago
    • Well, she prays that I marry an intelligent man with a great sense of humor, who will love me how Simon loves Martina. (And after showing her the uBEAT Interview blooper reel, she thinks Eli’s cute…so if you Nasty leaders are willing to set us up, my mom and I will thank you immensely, hahaha)

      4 years ago
    • Tell your mom that doctors aren’t a good idea, never eveeer evuuurrrr :x

      4 years ago
      • Why do you say that?

        4 years ago
        • People usually likes doctors because they are very intelligent, and that’s true, but because of that, they might also feel like they’re more than you, and treat you or speak to you like if you didn’t have the capacity to have a decent conversation with them.
          This might not aply to all of them, but for what I’ve seen in my school, everyone is just like that =_= Plus, they’re always bussy and hospitals are full of drama (not like in Grey’s Anatomy or such) but my mom told me that is very common and easy for male doctors to cheat on their wifes, since everyone wants to have a doctor as a husband. I honestly wouldn’t like to deal with that :I

          4 years ago
        • mgd

          While it is true many doctors are busy with work – and the hours that they are available are fairly irregular and inconvenient, not all doctors will look down on you for not having the same caliber of education, at least over here in the states. If you can match them in an intellectual conversation, and give them a good debate (by holding your ground, while still remaining open-minded) – some will be very impressed. Honestly many doctors have a good sense of the stress and struggles many students and low-wage workers have to face, because they have been there. If you think of ways to connect with someone, and I mean ANYONE, and you make an effort to do some things they enjoy, and find things to do together that neither of you have done before, as long as that person is making the same effort, almost anyone can be in a good relationship. ;)

          4 years ago
        • Yeah, I understand what you mean. Some people do get inflated egos when they are in a position like that. I think those type of people are the ones who mainly become doctors for the money, or the social status. There are those who do it for the good of others, but you don’t meet a lot of them. And if you do, they’re already usually taken. ^-^

          Btw, I was curious about your comment because I’m planning on doing pre-med in college this fall and I was wondering what type of people I might potentially be working with. Strange thing is that I don’t want to marry a doctor. It’s true that their profession puts work before family, and I don’t like that so I’m still on the fence about becoming one. But then on the other hand, I want to do some non-profit charity work internationally and would like to have medical skills (something like Doctors Without Borders?)

          4 years ago
        • It depends, I’m currently studying medicine too and my group was actually really nice. What I don’t like about this is that, if you want to outstand you have to get involved with the right people, and that can make you have a better grade or schedule with the best teachers. Also, as I said, most of the males are jerks. I mean, they feel that just because they study medicine they’re already doctors and they can get any girl =__=
          But well, besides that, you will always find all kinds of people. Of course there is people who wants this just because of the social status, but there are some others who are very nice and they really wanna help people (like my friends :D). Medicine is actually very interesting, you just have to stay away from people who will only damage you, and you’ll enjoy it a lot (:

          4 years ago
    • I think all Moms want their daughters to marry a version of Simon. Dorky and loveable!

      4 years ago
      • A-dork-able. That’s how I’d describe Simon. That, and gentlemanly. MOTHER FATHER, GENTLEMAN! (I may actually introduce my future bf to my parents like that)

        4 years ago
    • I want my very own Simon too.
      I call this imaginary man of mine “My Fanboy”
      That’s what I want/need.
      Nerd out with me on marvel, my future fanboy~ lol

      4 years ago
      • Too funny! This reminds me of the “date” I would always bring to school dances. His name was Vizzy (short for The Invisible Man), and he was an excellent slow dancer.

        4 years ago
      • My fanboy, my fanboy, ooh boy fanboy. nuhnuhnuhnuhnuhnuhnuhnuhnuhnuh
        my fanboy, my fanboy, baby nuhnuhnuhnuhnuhnuhnuh don’t let me down boy.

        I’d like to see Simon dance to this hehehehehehe.

        4 years ago
  86. Tagged as ‘Xiah Junsu’ hahaha loved this <3

    4 years ago
  87. “Tagged as xiah junsu” you killed me. #done but they really are conservative. (No secks shops? That sucks!)

    4 years ago
  88. My brothers are staring at me with a clear WTF face. …..awkward.

    4 years ago
  89. Hi EYK! I have a question: What do the citizens of Korea think of
    Foreign idols? Like do they respect them as much as their native Korean
    idols or not? For example, Tiffany of SNSD is from America and EXO’s
    Kris is from Canada/China :3

    4 years ago
    • Seconded: Visit Netizenbuzz more often.
      Let’s see… For Nichkhun-they’re basically telling him to go back to Thailand and “Stop earning the money of Koreans”.

      4 years ago
    • Depends who. Victoria, and Nichkhun (pre scandal) were probably the most popular and generally liked idols who are foreign, especially with their huge wgm stint. Fei is also becoming more popular with her reality show appearances. I believe most people will look past nationality or ethnicity, but would still see them as outsiders nonetheless.

      4 years ago
    • Um well we know the answer of what SM Ent thinks of Chinese idols. Cough Hangeng! They think any idol who isn’t Korean is second class. I’ve asked this alot on many blogs and forums, always the same. Koreans are held higher. Tiffany and Jessica might be looked at differently because they are Korean.

      4 years ago
    • See you there!!! x]

      4 years ago
  90. can’t wait to see lots of photobooth pics!!!

    4 years ago
  91. FYI, love motels are really popular here in Argentina, it’s so funny to see people shocked about them bc for us is so…common?

    4 years ago
    • maybe we are just /that/ horny, idk

      4 years ago
    • We don’t have any here in Finland so I guess it really depends on place.. and culture. Here I’d say people’d probaply go hotel for sex: more romantic that way, or then just do it in their homes.

      4 years ago
    • Yeah, but motels that you can rent for the hour? Motels with dildi in the vending machines? Is that common?

      4 years ago
      • Can’t you do this in Japan too? From what I’ve seen in *cough*manga*cough*anime…

        4 years ago
      • Those kinds of “specialty motels” by the hour or 3-hour intervals also exist in the Philippines and other parts of Southeast Asia

        4 years ago
      • These kinds of love motels are actually popular here in Brazil too! And people don’t go there just because they live with the family and it would be weird to take your bf/gf home… Some of these love motels are “thematic”, so people (even married couples) go there just for a change :)

        4 years ago
        • I am also brazilian (YAY, FELLOW BRAZILIAN NASTIES!!) and I see a lot of these love motels. I once had an awkward talk with my girl friends (we kind of leveled up our friendship intimacy :P) and they were telling me about how these love motels work. When you enter the love motel with a car, none of its workers will see you.. you communicate through a telephone thingie, I guess. when you pay, you also aren’t seen. my friend told me they paid with credit card and on the… bank statement (???) they put other names on there. like, they won’t write you paid that amount of money on a love motel, but they will put it like you spent the money on building material lol

          4 years ago
        • We have the same in Portugal. Many people that go there are married.

          4 years ago
        • We do? I didn’t know about that ahahah

          4 years ago
        • Na zona de Sintra, que eu conheça, há 2. Encontram-se em zonas mais escondidas para haver mais privacidade. ;) Conheço vários casais casados que já lá foram algumas vezes.

          4 years ago
        • Me neither. I mean… Nem eu.

          4 years ago
      • they have these in Japan as well

        4 years ago
      • you can rent it for two hours or “pernocte” which is like 12 hours or so. No vending machines but room service for dildos and lube and condoms!

        4 years ago
        • I’m from Panama and we got them here as well! A hotel like that is called a “push-button”, but they don’t actually look like hotels! They are located far away from any crowded area, in the middle of a highway (for example) and they got these bright neon light with cheesy names like “You and I” or “Las Vegas”. They’re made of a series of separate rooms, each one with a private entrance and garage having an automatic door.

          The couple will park inside an open garage and the guy will “push a button” to close the door for the lady to get out of the car privately… therefore the name “push button”. Then there’s a doorbell to be rung and a slot where money should be slipped inside to a person you can’t see located behind a door (around USD $15.00 for an hour will do the fare) and tada… it’s all set!

          They’re very unromantic places to escape to because people gotta be quick and because just when time is about to finish they will call your room to advise it and to ask whether or not you want to pay for another hour xD …AWKWARD!

          4 years ago
        • that kind od ‘room service’ sounds pretty awkward haha

          4 years ago
      • I did not realize the plural for “dildo” was dildi…or is it dildos?

        4 years ago
        • “Dildos” looks like “Dil-dosss,” which sounds like a computer language. “Dildi” sounds more scientific.

          4 years ago
        • Dil-Doss, new flavoured operating system! =P

          4 years ago
        • My brain read your “Dil-doss” as “Do-si-do.” Time for a grand ole dildo do-si-do, I think Junsu should spear head this dance revolution.

          4 years ago
        • We are having a discussion on the plural form of dildos c:

          4 years ago
        • “Dildi,” you mean ;)

          4 years ago
  92. Yeah… In America, those aren’t called “Love Motels”. They’re just called motels.

    4 years ago
    • Personally I dislike motels cuz they can end up being kinda gross. I mean who wants to get it on in a room that feels icky and looks icky! Love Motels I think are different they are designed for that purpose and I’ve heard of love motels that offer different things like cosplay and S&M theme rooms. Also love motels try to keep their customers privacy.

      4 years ago
    • Yup there are plenty of Shady Motels you can rent by the hour that serve the same purpose. The only difference is it’s not an exclusive or well advertised reason for hourly rental. All the crime shows show it people CSI, Breaking Bad, all of em. Plus Motels really don’t show up in the good part of town either.

      4 years ago
    • Not really. Most are just for ppl traveling on a budget & sleepy truckdrivers

      4 years ago
    • I feel like our motels are just cheap and low quality places to stay when you’re traveling. SK’s Love Motels look a lot more appropriate for sex than the average US motel lol… most aren’t that appealing.

      4 years ago
  93. Thanks Simon and Martina! Get some sleep :)

    4 years ago
  94. Question: Are there a lot of public swimming pools in South Korea? Where I’m from there’s a good number (Texas is in a drought) and there are little water-spray-areas.

    4 years ago
    • I would think so, since alot of people live in apartments and dont have pools. I think they have them alot in gyms too. I know they have them in Japan. There’s like one water spray place/park that I always see in kdramas/shows like sesame player where everyones getting soaked and playing around.

      4 years ago
      • Coolio. I was just wondering as the heat here in Texas has invaded my brain ^-^

        4 years ago
      • Awesome! I had heard somewhere that there weren’t all that many and for some reason it interests me. :)

        4 years ago
  95. Shots fired at Se7en, I saw that Martina.

    4 years ago
  96. Shpoonk…that’s a new one!

    Gotta say, a RELATIVELY more open culture in terms of sexual culture is something I love about living here (Northeastern US–can’t speak for the some of the south? But apparently sex is just for making babies and otherwise sinful. And according to my traditional Asian parents, women who take birth control are huge sluts…-___- so illogical). Although I do remember going to Paris and seeing a movie poster with boobies all hanging out. I was surprised and then after seeing like 100 more of them I really didn’t care. I wish we were more like that! And censorship in video games–a woman’s naked body in the occasional sexual context is BAD BAD BAD, but shooting like 500 soldiers in the face and watching their head explode in slow-mo is totally cool. Mind boggling.

    4 years ago
    • There are places in the south that are real hush hush about sex and sexuality (where it’s a dirty dirty sin and you’ll die a horrid death and all that nonsense), but for the most part, it’s pretty open in my region.

      4 years ago
  97. I went on a date with a Korean guy when I first moved there, and I knew things were a little more modest there. He tried to kiss me on the street in the middle of a bunch of people and I was like, “Whoa, people are looking at us.” and he said “That’s okay! You’re foreigner!”

    Surprise! Didn’t see him again after that.

    4 years ago
    • Racist AND sexist! What an ass! :(

      I just watched a video by an African-American woman talking about a really shitty date in which the dude was not only a total asshole in making assumptions about her, but went far enough to make her feel like she was in danger! (Not fucking cool!!) It’s tough enough being a lady in Western countries where feminism isn’t a totally foreign concept. Must be way worse in a country dominated by Confucian values and homogeneity.

      *Air fist-pump of solidarity*

      4 years ago
    • What I meant by disgraceful women was that there are some women who don’t take good care of themselves and will let people take advantage of them. If you go to a foreign country and let the “perverted men” do whatever they want with you, they’re going to perceive you as an easy girl or a promiscuous person and also deem every other woman from your country to be the same way. I was responding to the girl and giving her props for not letting someone dictate her actions while she spent time in that country. It’s okay to have sex with more than one person. I don’t care how many partners someone has or has been with, it’s really about how they take care of themselves. Are they respecting their bodies, their health and their partners, or are they being disrespectful, careless etc…?

      4 years ago
    • wanna tell you the truth behind this?
      guys are considered as cool if they have a foreign gf …he just wanted people to stare at him and say

      omg look at that one , he ‘s got a white girl …

      4 years ago
    • Yeah, my Korean boyfriend was similar at first! He would always try to kiss me and touch me, and I’d have to tell him to stop. I talked to him about it though, and he said he thought that was what American girls wanted. I know it sounds shallow, but he was pretty innocently dumb about it. Luckily, we talked it out, and he realized (maybe to his disappointment lol) that I’m really no different than Korean girls. He is much more respectful now. :) I’m glad you left him, but don’t give up on Korean guys just cuz of this one bad one! :)

      4 years ago
      • i agree with that I had similar experience with a Korean guy I was friends with that lived in a other part of the world he didn’t live in korea anymore but he wasn’t from here and he came to America. so we the first time we met he wanted to have sex to go to a hotel… and idk …. he wanted to get laid ….

        4 years ago
      • Part of it has to do with media portrayal – some of the most popular “Western” shows that Koreans watch are Gossip Girl, Vampire Diaries, etc., which are obviously very sexualized depictions of Americans. Kind of like how kpop fans make a lot of wrong assumptions about Korean people because of what they see in kpop and kdramas.

        4 years ago
    • or women who like sex and refuse to treat it like a commodity to hold over men’s heads which incidentally makes us more of an “object” and is partially responsible for a lot of the sexual inequity we experience in nearly any arena.
      if you want the guy, kiss the guy. if not, then it’s just not for you, not now. but don’t go throwing shade on some other girls who know what they want and aren’t afraid to go for it.

      4 years ago
    • I think she meant disgraceful in a woman that kisses an almost stranger in public sort of way not just a sexually active woman kind of way.

      4 years ago
      • Unfortunately I still don’t think it’s right to judge a women as disgraceful simply for kissing a guy in public (who is kissing her, too). That’s harsh and a bit myopic. Perhaps if she were actively hitting on a stranger in front of his wife? But otherwise, again, the man is also involved in this kiss, he’s not being called disgraceful, and they’re happily and consensually doing so. Might be gross to look at, but then just don’t look haha.

        4 years ago
        • But it was already obvious that the guy was behaving badly there was no need to comment on that. I feel like all if you are taking her comment out of context and just running with it instead of thinking logically about her meaning in that comment. Logic over emotion please. Also pda is rude and impolite. People know it makes others uncomfortable and yet they still do it. Just save it for when you’re alone.

          4 years ago
        • PDA doesn’t always make others uncomfortable and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with hand holding, hugging, or a little kissing in public. I’m not entirely comfortable with people making out right in front of me and I would personally prefer if they kept it to themselves and did those kinds of things in private, but if a couple happen to get swept up in their passions who am I to judge them? Also in my opinion I haven’t taken the aforementioned comment out of context, nor am I thinking about it illogically. I’ve reread the comment and I stand by what I said.

          4 years ago
        • You’re right that it should be obvious the guy was behaving badly–but unfortunately, not everyone sees it that way! Additionally, she implied that if the girl were to let him kiss her, she would apparently be an “easy” girl, and that partaking in sexual activities (kissing and beyond) with him with less reservation than other (Korean?) women would give women a bad name (and that women who do this are “disgraceful”). Regardless, it’s a bit of a blanket judgmental statement, condemns female sexuality, and as said above, myopic in the grand scheme of things.

          Although we can’t exactly tell what kind of kiss the guy was going for (peck on the cheek/lips? A sweep-off-the-feet full on mouth plant? Who knows), what’s appropriate in public and what’s not changes depending on who you ask. In Japan, a peck on the cheek when you say good bye may make others uncomfortable while elsewhere no one would bat an eyelash. In this case, Koreans might have found it a bit odd. However, I’m still not connecting the logic in why participating in that mild PDA would make a girl easy/disgraceful.

          Female sexuality is a hot button, although I hope most of these responses were written as blandly and emotionlessly as possible.

          4 years ago
    • Although perhaps not intentional, this type of view is generally harmful for women–people often center on the woman’s behavior and forget the man involved, much like victim blaming in (to go to the extreme) rape and abuse cases. Labeling the woman as “disgraceful” and ignoring the man for the same behavior is unfair. Furthermore, two consensual adults deciding they are attracted to each other and enjoying what can be a satisfying, natural experience (for one time or however many times–doesn’t matter) shouldn’t be problematic unless one of them is unavailable. Both men and women should be able to sleep with whomever that way, and we aren’t to judge them. It doesn’t affect us (except in the way below, more on that later). They’re not harming anyone.

      In this case, my problem is not that the woman and man (or, hell, just two people in general) may engage in a one night stand should they want that from each other, but rather the man’s behavior. His behavior (making idiotic assumptions and acting on them) is the one that affects women (and I suppose other men, by making them look creepy). He assumes based off someone’s nationality that she is sexually available and targets her (her vagina, really…) SOLELY because she’s foreign. It’d be fine if they spent the night dancing/talking/etc., she seems really into him and he likes her, and he decides to go for it from that, but because she’s foreign, he presumptuously decides he’s going to get into her pants because it’s EASIER. That’s creepy–he wouldn’t try that on someone else.

      It’s pretty much just as creepy or presumptuous if you assumed every man approaching you in South Africa was about to rape you. Or you ask a white girl if she’s a Russian prostitute. Or if you assume all Japanese women are sexually repressed and therefore into all sorts of kink and crazy in bed. Or if you date Asian women because they are all obedient, delicate flowers and less likely to speak their mind/disagree with you. Or you only date white men because all Asian men are meek and feminized. In other words, making assumptions about someone because of their nationality is unfortunate, as was spoken about in the last TL;DR.

      4 years ago
      • Thank you, I sensed some slut shaming/easy shaming. If its safe and consensual its fine, the real issue is the objectification of women by men.

        4 years ago
        • Is that foreign experience real? Is man whores a phenomena like slut shaming of women? Could you explain more.

          4 years ago
      • Well said! *applause*

        4 years ago
    • what the heck! On a first date? If so, I would so embarrass him with his pal on the street.

      Does Korean guy thinks foreigners are not within the rule or something?

      4 years ago
      • Yes, pretty much. Koreans view Westerners as “easy”, as someone who are very sexualized and open to pretty much anything. If a Western woman goes to Korea, men will think she is an easy catch. Simon and Martina has talked about this in their videos too.

        4 years ago
        • I just have to say: not all Korean men are creeps who think foreign girls are easy, BUT it’s important for foreign ladies living there to know that attitude exists. Not acknowledging it can lead to some pretty unpleasant and potentially awful situations in my experience.

          4 years ago
        • I couldn’t have said it better myself.

          4 years ago
        • Chinese guys view western girls as easy too. Shame that one of our teachers didn’t help that stereotype any…

          4 years ago
    • Please tell me you rearranged this dude’s face >_>

      4 years ago
      • I just politely refused and didn’t ever see him again after that. Actually, he didn’t try to contact me either. He must have just assumed I was easy (as many men assume of American women in Korea.)

        4 years ago
    • Oh man, that’s just ridiculous. Did you smack him in front of everybody?

      4 years ago
  98. I know Korean girls whose mother’s never even talked to them about menstruation. And when they got their periods they thought they were dying, but too embarrassed to tell their moms. This is how limited the conversations in Korea are about sex.

    4 years ago
    • I never had “the talk” with my parents either and never talk about sex with any of them, I think it depends on the family itself rather than the nationality

      4 years ago
    • I never really got the Talk from my parents either, as in, they wait till you’re a certain age and then tell you everything. I was pretty young when I started to ask questions about were babies come from, and they always just told me, whenever I had a new question or learned about something new on the playground, I’d ask them about it, and they’d tell me. This, however, only works when your child wants to know about sexuality. My sister never wanted to hear everything about it. If my parents tried to tell her about it, she would just put her hands over her ears! This really worried my parents when she got a boyfriend though, they were afraid she would have seks without protection, since she never wanted to learn about it.

      4 years ago
    • lots of moms drop the ball here in the states too. i was like, hemorrhaging in gym class, they sent me home and my mom was all “you did that already? i thought i had like 4 more years?”
      uh a decade later.. same awkward talk on my wedding night… O.o

      4 years ago
      • *shrugs* My mom didn’t get hers until high school. (Might’ve had something to do with the diets back then? Btw, this would’ve been during the 70s, when Asia wasn’t what it is today, economically.)

        I knew I’d get my period someday because I’d been with my mom at the supermarket* when she bought pads, and she (very awkwardly) explained what they were for. So when I got mine at age 12 I didn’t think I was dying or anything like what’s-her-name in My Girl. But I’ll bet that no young woman in the history of, oh, EVER would have faced her first pair of ruined undies with what one could even charitably call “composure.”

        (Yeah. I still flipped out.)

        * Actually, it was a warehouse store called Costco. We’re Asian-Americans—what DON’T we buy in bulk?

        4 years ago
    • Wow actually I think Korean BOYS were more likely victims of hushed/not so appropriate sex education!
      They learn from porns first and then are educated when their school’s cool enough to do so. There ARE schools providing accurate and specific educations though! Like the one I went to>_<
      AAAANYHOO, from my experience, they don't take it seriously. Schools should really work on their sex education!!
      And for girls, thankfully since I go to girl's Univ. so it's kinda easy to get information from school and there are lectures held occasionally about sexual self-esteem and protections and all.

      4 years ago
    • It sort of reminds me of the super-religious parents pulling their kids out of sex-ed classes, or opposing it altogether. It’s IMPORTANT. My parents were just glad we had sex-ed in school because they didn’t have to go through the awkwardness of explaining it to me (and school would be more accurate, anyway).

      It *seems* to work out in Korea because it seems like people actually stay away from sex as teenagers? I remember something about teen pregnancy being very low….Still, I think it’s a good idea for people to learn about their bodies, even if it’s just to keep people from freaking out about menstruation or erections :|

      Conversely, in other countries, teens are going to have sex whether you try to stop them or not, which is why sex-ed is really important, since it teaches them to at least be safe if they can’t be deterred.

      4 years ago
    • That sounds like a horrible experience to go trough : / Oh well, europeans are pretty much the complete opposites.

      4 years ago
    • Gosh, I had a similar situation. (Although I don’t live in Korean, nor am I korean.)
      I didn’t tell my mom for about 3 months ; and my parents never even gave me a talk about sex. Thankfully the internet was there to teach me.

      4 years ago
      • I feel like this blog post is old enough that I can say this without too much embarrassment… Don’t feel bad. I started my period when I was 11 and hid it from my mom until I was 16. :/ She never talked to me about it or anything, never gave me a sex talk, and never even taught me how to shave my legs. At least now I know what NOT to do when raising my own daughter in the future…

        4 years ago
      • i think it’s an asian thing. my mom never talk to me about sex either. When i first got my period, my mom give me a pad and that’s it. 10 years ago i’m not an internet savvy person so i rely on my friends to tell me about cramps and pubes. lol

        4 years ago
      • I second that. I was about 7-8 and the older girls treated me like i was an idiot because i didn’t know what sex was. Curious me googled and was greeted by the world of porn…i was pretty messed up after that lol

        4 years ago
      • Yeah, otherwise you might end up like me, reading an article about “what
        you would do if you had a penis for a day” ( “slap it around on tables and stuff” [ holy shit, OUCH! ], “pee while standing”, and other weird stuff ). Or an article about losing
        one’s virginity and reading someone’s story in the comments about how she lost it to a
        normal guy who suddenly screamed “BA-CAWWWW!” when he climaxed. The
        internet is a strange place. A hilariously strange place.

        4 years ago
      • I agree with this. I didn’t wanna talk to my parents about sex when I started having *those* feelings, and things quickly got awkward.

        4 years ago
      • It may or may not. Who knows? I think I’m pretty well informed now. I’m not sure who to go to for correct education. A flaw in the education system here in the US was ; learning about sex in 5th/7th grade. (My school atleast.) What 11 year old is going to care about it? Then when high school comes around they don’t mention sex at all. It’s terrible. That’s when kids are having sex.

        4 years ago
        • I went to a crazy middle school where on the bus, all the little 11-12 year olds were talking about how much sex they’ve had, so I don’t think its entirely a flaw to have sex ed. so early…but then, maybe I just grew up in a bad neighborhood.

          4 years ago
        • My school started talking about that stuff to us when we were in 5th grade.. I remember they separated the boys and girls into different rooms and started talking to us about it and for us 5th graders…ohh my was it awkward! I feel like the schools pounded it into our brains in health class ever since then…

          4 years ago
        • A few years ago there was a great webshow called “The Mid West Teen Sex Show”, a comedy show that gives real information on sex topics teens care about. It’s freaking hilarious at any age. It’s not porn and it’s not like it shows anything directly but it certainly gives you lots of info and lots to talk about. Looks like it has a youtube channel now http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL014AE8B37B97F3BB. The first one is a bit rough, but they are all awesome, not in your face and totally don’t make you squeamish. If you are having trouble starting a conversation with your teen (or older children), I totally recommend it. I also otherwise recommend it to anyone for the lulz.

          4 years ago
        • My school did at around 6th grade. We had a required “Human Growth and Development” class. Some of the teachers still thought it was too early, but I got my period when I was about 11. My parents had never given me “the Talk” (they still haven’t, actually, but I know enough now), but luckily we had just talked about menstruation in class the week before.

          4 years ago
        • My parents didn’t give me or my siblings “the Talk” either, but I suppose they figured that they didn’t need too since we had Sex ED

          4 years ago
        • Honestly, I think schools are in a pickle when it comes to the subject of birth control. They don’t want to encourage sex (because things don’t always work the way they should, or at all XD), but they don’t wanna ignore it when it’s all up in their faces.

          4 years ago
        • Same here. We heard about it, but with a catholic highschool, they just push abstinence. They aren’t really supposed to teach other birth control methods at all. Luckily some of the teachers ignored this (either in gym or religion class) so we managed to get the full picture

          4 years ago
      • Just stick to those .gov websites ;) E.g., womenshealth.gov. Or the CDC, NIH…etc.

        4 years ago
  99. Hah I remember on my orientation day for university they gave you a little bag full of stuff then at the bottom was lube and a condom. We were all thinking OMG WHAT KIND OF PLACE IS THISSS? I think its good to be more open about it than not but at the time it was frightening and hilarious.

    Also my Japanese prof said that in Japan if someones says they’re going out for a drive they’re actually going to a love motel. So I guess its the same.

    4 years ago
  100. what happened to the KMM this week :(

    4 years ago
  101. Yay my donation got through ^3^ I know it isn’t much but I hope I can help with my low loan ^3^

    4 years ago
  102. “TAGGED AS: Xiah Junsu”

    Wait what? Am I missing something here? LMAO

    Oh and what a lovely way to end the video/blog post ;~;

    4 years ago
    • wait is Junsu gay?

      4 years ago
      • That, my friend, is up to your imagination if Tarantallegra means what I think it does XD

        4 years ago
        • I was just asking, people! I didn’t mean it negatively, I am fine either way if he is or not. What was offensive about asking? And, uh, “Tarantallegra is a spell used by Draco Malfoy on “Harry Potter and The Chamber of Secrets” during a practice at the Duelling Club where he uses the “Tarantallegra” spell against Harry making his legs dance without control. In fact the song also has a similar meaning behind it where Junsu casts a spell that will surely make everyone dance without control. ” …right? I know he dresses as a girl in the vid, but I didn’t think anything of it, actually. ahh But I looked into it more and they got him a shirt that says “Sorry girls, I’m gay” for his birthday and were talking about how it really fit Junsu so I guess he is?

          4 years ago
        • I didn’t mean to cast your comment in a negative light; I was just making a joke about the Tarantallegra video. It makes sexuality all artsy fartsy, and I just can’t help but take a few shots at it, because of the androgynous character Junsu plays.

          4 years ago
        • I was just asking, people! I didn’t mean it negatively, I am fine either way if he is or not. What was offensive about asking? And, uh, “Tarantallegra is a spell used by Draco Malfoy in “Harry Potter and The Chamber of Secrets” during a practice at the Dueling Club where he uses the “Tarantallegra” spell against Harry making his legs dance without control. In fact the song also has a similar meaning behind it where Junsu casts a spell that will surely make everyone dance without control. ” …right? I know he dresses as a girl in the vid, but I didn’t think anything of it, actually. ahh But I looked into it more and they got him a shirt that says “Sorry girls, I’m gay” for his birthday and were talking about how it really fit Junsu so I guess he is?

          4 years ago
        • Actually, Junsu said himself that he isn’t gay in this interview:
          http://jyj3.net/2012/07/24/trans-jyj-junsu-10asiastar-vol-14-interview/

          “Actually, because this kind of style, some of the overseas fans would think the main character in “TARANTALLEGRA” is not me. Some would say “so handsome, is he ‘GAY’?” (laugh) Even though I’m not “GAY” but I like hearing this kind of comment. As long as I can show everyone a different side, no matter if am “GAY” or not, as an artist, I feel like this definitely the main reason that will add more points to me.”

          Whether you choose to believe his words though is up to you, as I know kpop fans who just refuse to believe some idols are straight. I believe him though, I don’t think his style in Tarantallegra makes him gay at all. It’s just theatre-esque. He has woman all over him in that mv anyway lol.

          4 years ago
        • I believe him too, but tbh no idol would admit being gay since it would destroy their career,

          4 years ago
        • I actually don’t think Junsu or most K-Pop idols are gay (okay, I kind of think Jo Kwon is, but he’s such a troll that it’s hard to tell if it’s an act or not). I joke about it sometimes because Tarantallegra is so in your face with the sexual imagery; I honestly don’t know what half of that video is supposed to mean XD

          4 years ago
      • No, just sexy.

        4 years ago
  103. Hola Simon and Martina! :D

    4 years ago
    • ..bout to watch the vid..but figured I’d say hi xP

      4 years ago
      • Hi!

        4 years ago
        • oh yay u guys responded xD :,) but ..interesting video btw xP hope u two are doing well~ at..almost 5 am in the morning in korea O.e xP

          4 years ago
        • Yeah! We’re doing great. Kinda sleepy. Gonna comment a bit longer and then sleep in tomorrow till 2PM, the hottest time of day :D

          4 years ago
        • oh awesome! :D lol 2PM ..wow o.o idk if thats good or badx.x xP but Good night then~ ^^

          4 years ago
        • Hello to everyone!

          4 years ago
  104. Just want to say guys, thanks for all the hard work you all put into making your videos. :) according to my calculations it’s really “early” in Korea right now. Instead of sleeping your busy uploading videos for us so thankyou ^^

    4 years ago